"It was the crack of dawn. Winter. It's been cold so I wore my human suit to sleep that night, and I also lit my house on fire hoping it'd keep me warm. I took a shower and thought to myself, today's gonna be a good day!"
"It wasn't."
"Hard day at work - my boss wouldn't stop yellin' at me, my co-workers were coming at me from all angles, I had piles upon piles of paperwork to go through, and there was no more coffee in the break room."
"So I went to the bar afterwards to drown out my sorrows. I might've had too much to drink, but that isn't the point. Anyway, I was sittin' there just minding my own business when suddenly..."