But I don't like being stalked?
But I do like being able to see where people I actually want to play with are.
I propose a friend list type of thing.
You see who's online, you propose to be their friend, they accept, you can now see what server they are in.
You should also have the ability to remove people from your friend list, and a "quick join" feature, so you automatically join the server they are in, if there is room.