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Topics - Foxscotch

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and there rarely is anymore. but it's like a habit. a few times a day I'll just reflexively open a new tab and type "f", which inevitably autocompletes to https://forum.blockland.us/, then I'll look around for a few seconds, get bored, and close the tab
I don't think it's even really a negative thing. it's just how things have turned out. people move on. but it's got me thinking lately about my time here, and all the people I knew, and all the things that have happened in my life since I started playing this game, and how much of that is probably because of people I met here. the difference between what this forum is to me now, and what it was to me in the past



since the beginning of the year I've made 120 posts (excluding this one). but I used to post here all the time, I was like a freak about it. my old account has an average of 40.8 posts per active day. in a single average week, I'd make twice as many posts as I have in all of 2023 so far. and there were outliers where I made over 120 in a single day. probably way more than that on occasion. isn't that crazy in comparison? between the two accounts, I've spent nearly a year and a half in total on the forum. bizarrely, despite the far greater number of posts on the old account, I actually have three more days online on this account than the former. maybe that's because of... well, all of this. I open it, becoming "active", and leave without doing much else

it was properly lively back then though. lots of other people had similar, or even higher, posts per day. now, I can skip checking for days and practically the only thing new is a post in the geese thread. we actually got lucky this week, with a cool-sounding gamemode in General Discussion. I don't really have anything to contribute there though. the last several times I've opened the game were to get screenshots as references for one purpose or another. the last time I actually played was four years ago, and I can't imagine that was for more than a few minutes



ok anyway back to the actual premise of this post. back in those days I was a pretty lonely little kid, didn't really have any friends at school, so blockland and the forum was it for me. I don't think I had much direction either, I didn't know what I wanted to do or be as an adult. but through friends here I ended up finding an interest in programming, and with some of their encouragement, pursued it. one thing led to another, and now I've got an in-person social life I'm happy with, a successful and fulfilling career as a software developer, and still have time for hobbies, and my online friends, who remain important to me and always will. I've skipped a lot of steps in that description but that's fine this isn't really about all of that. it's just about the broader stuff

and then there's everyone I met here. a few I still talk to regularly, daily even. more I kind of keep in touch with but don't really speak to that often. and the majority, who I haven't spoken to in years, and would probably not be able to get in contact with if I tried. but I still think of all these people often. I remember a skype group with ipquarx, hellhound, facepalm, frontrox, shadowsfear, and several others. I remember talking to gravity cat on MSN almost every day, and trying to start a very short-lived clan with jamestheleet. hanging out with the KC group all the time even though, in retrospect, I think they probably found me annoying. a night on skype when frontrox introduced me to Muse's Knights of Cydonia while we talked, a song I still listen to all the time, and can't help but think of him every time I hear it. kanew, who I can't even think of any specific memories with, I just know I cared about him and that's enough. there are countless more memories like this that all have a really big place in my mind. I don't have to go digging for any of them, they're just sitting right under the surface, waiting for an opportunity to come up again. it's almost routine

and there are more bittersweet memories, particularly of people who seem lost to time. a lot of people had this experience with vegetarian zombie, who dropped off the face of the earth, as far as I know. my steam friends list shows them as "last online 11 years ago". we weren't close, but it's still sad. for me there was skelolego, who I really only knew for a short period of time, but I just can't shake him. star9578 is probably the only other person who cares about him as much, if they even still do. who knows. I haven't talked to them in almost as long as skelo. he just disappeared, and there's just this vague sense of unease related to him and all the other members with a similarly unknown fate. don't even know if they're still, euphemistically, around. closure would be nice, to at least know what happened, whether they're gone, they drive for uber, or graduated college and got a nice job, or work in retail. just to know

it's funny how few bad memories I have. at any given time I'm sure I thought some people here would be, like, lifelong arch nemeses, or that some negative experience would hang around in the back of my head forever. but, at the risk of sounding sappy, the love is all that's really stuck



I wonder a lot about whether all of the people I remember so fondly also remember me. if they think about me as often as I do them. do I occupy a space in skelolego's heart, like he does in mine? does gravity cat remember talking on MSN when our time zones lined up? I tend to assume they don't. I have an awful little maladaptive habit of thinking of myself as a background character in other people's lives. it's not very realistic, but I can't help it. maybe I need therapy lol. I find myself assuming that they must not think of me, since they stopped talking to me. but that's not really fair, because I stopped talking to them too

and on the other side of the same coin, how many people do remember me, think of me occasionally, who I've forgotten? sometimes I take a nostalgic trip through old posts, usually with some purpose that I soon forget about in favor of reading pages upon pages of forum threads from the old days. that's how I ended up here tonight, in case that's not already obvious. tonight I saw a thread asking everyone who they'd like to meet in person someday, and I found posts from myself and shinji/strovbe mentioning each other. but now, tonight, I can't recall a single memory involving them. their name feels familiar, but that's all I can muster up. yet, at the time, they must have been somehow important to me, and I to them. do they, maybe, think of me? would they be sad to read this post and find that I don't remember them? if they do, am I responsible for that? should I have done more to remember them? rhetorical questions



I'm not too sure where else to go with this. really I just wanted to get these thoughts out. it might have been better suited for a journal or something, but I don't have a routine of doing that, and this seems like a strange way to start, so I think this outlet suits it well enough. I don't expect much of anyone to read it, much less reply. this is a lot of text and it got pretty personal and sentimental up there. but if anyone else feels like talking about this sort of stuff, I'd be glad to read about your own feelings or experiences. or whatever you wanna talk about really. this post didn't have a lot of direction to begin with. it's late at night, and I got maybe 4 hours of some low-quality sleep last night on a plane, so don't judge me

thanks though!! for reading it, if you did. and for everything else, either way. it's pretty different these days, but nothing will change the fact that this forum is and was important to me. I guess only badspot knows how much time we have left on here. I'd like to see it stick around a while, even just for those nostalgia trips, if nothing else. if it was totally up to me, I think I'd have him wait until after masterlegodude catches up to my old account. it feels like that'd make a nice final entry into his chronology thread

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Off Topic / happy pride month everybody
« on: June 01, 2023, 09:56:18 PM »
this may be our last together. only time will tell. anyway this rest of this OP is a little bit sappy

realizing my queerness and my furryness have both had a massive positive impact on my life, and while I'm sure these discoveries would have happened at some point, what I know is that they happened when they did because of this forum. it's not the best community in the world, and I'm sure someone's gonna reply to this thread to prove that yet again, just like every other year, but that's ok. aside from the lifelong connections I made here, my introduction to furries in particular has made a big difference in my relationships both online and in person; I never really had friends I could hang out with regularly irl before, but now I do, thanks to all the people I know through being a furry, including local pride organizations and other queer groups. and of course that furryness is intrinsically linked to my queerness, because that's just how it goes. being a furry means knowing a lot of other queer people and that has led to a bunch of queer self-discoveries that probably would've been pretty hard to come by otherwise

but that's all. just a little nostalgic reflection. I hope the rest of you have an excellent pride month

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Games / re: counter strike 2 is pretty much half life source
« on: April 01, 2023, 10:55:59 PM »
that was not the bottom line at all. continue discussion

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Off Topic / this thread is specifically for maxwell[numbers]
« on: December 26, 2022, 10:01:11 PM »
sorry I don't remember the numbers. anyway there is a meme of a little 3d cat named maxwell (based on a real cat named maxwell I presume) going around lately. it's cute. it wiggles back and forth in silly environments and there's a cute song playing. that's how the meme works. it's cute and it reminds me of you because your name is also maxwell
if anyone knows maxwell and can get in contact with them please link them to this thread. thanks

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Off Topic / bloukface wanted me to say hi on his behalf
« on: October 29, 2022, 09:01:04 PM »

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Off Topic / pride month 2022
« on: June 01, 2022, 12:16:03 PM »
dying though the forum may be, it's still pride month. happy pride month to all my fellow gays. if you post in this thread, you're automatically gay, by decree of the king

note: "gay" is used here as shorthand for "queer". trans hets are obviously welcome, not to mention aloveual people etc

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Off Topic / I am married
« on: January 02, 2022, 02:48:38 AM »
to androfox. I know this is not the first inter-blf marriage. but it may very well be the second. unless carolcat and qwepir got hitched at some point
rigel is somewhat responsible. now that's what i call stellar nucleosynthesis https://forum.blockland.us/index.php?topic=293867

anyway good luck to everyone else on getting married if that is one of your goals

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Off Topic / pride month mf
« on: June 01, 2021, 11:52:10 AM »
hello bitches. did you think i would forget? no. happy pride month



⚠ straights not permitted ⚠

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https://forum.blockland.us/index.php?topic=318728

by the end of the thread it was basically clear beyond a reasonable doubt that boltster slapped together a really bad low-effort image host to play a fat jape on lord tony. anyway we never got closure and I want to hear it from the horse's mouth.......... boltster if you're out there admit to us that you did this

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Off Topic / a landmark in inactivity
« on: August 29, 2019, 07:45:36 PM »


this is for the drama forum bro. how tf is  d r a m a  not gonna have a post in over four days on the blockland forum? this place has been dead ever since I stopped posting here. cause and effect bitches

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Off Topic / pride decade 202x thread
« on: June 05, 2019, 09:30:42 PM »
it's pride decade (202x) and i aint see a forgetin pride decade (202x) thread. yall slippin. where's all the rainbow avatars at
anyway it's pride decade (202x). talk about how rad it is to not be cishet

just two rules for this thread:
be gay. if you are cishet and you post here you are hereby GAY. periodt
also forget terfs. that one explains itself
and last but not least, never forget: black lives matter

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first of all what the forget
I didn't see one of these threads so here's one
the remains of this post are spoilers because I can't be forgeted to make it transparent (nor could I be forgeted to select a bunch of transparent text to read it) so just don't read it if you don't wanna get spoiled, u have been warned






so what the forget !!!
what the forget? why. that was so stupid. who wrote this. why
so like the first big problem I will say is that it's just dumb. like this is.... so dumb. why? what the forget. goodbye, half of the movies marvel could've made in the next several years.  half the cool characters. like seriously as much as I love rocket, he's really the only one of the guardians left? wtf lol. and it was so anticlimactic too. like in the last ten minutes everyone is just dissolving. ok cool. fuk of. what was the point in the movie? why even bother, just start off the next one with "btw thanos killed half of everyone, so....." and ur done. saved all this bullstuff money. all of the deaths, really, were anticlimactic. gamora's is probably the only one that even remotely mattered
and SECONDLY are the stones destroyed or not? I couldn't really tell and it's not like I could rewind it. the gauntlet itself was obviously forgeted up. anyway the point is if the stones ARE destroyed, then what's thanos's plan? cus in terms of population we've only been sent back like 50 years. seriously not a big deal, as far as overpopulation issues go, especially seeing as this doesn't mean we'll lose our medical technology
how's iron man gonna get back? I guess that's why nebula was left alive so she can fly a ship back to wherever. kinda dumb

also not really a spoiler but why is thanos's home planet called titan. I thought they were talking about saturn's moon for like the first half of the movie


anyway idk.................. did you like it or what
for the record I did like the movie as a whole just the ending was pretty annoying

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so every new year you are supposed to make a wish, whatever you want, with the only stipulation being that it must be for someone else's benefit
what's yours?

also it has to benefit someone else

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Off Topic / Freek's arg
« on: November 13, 2016, 07:33:36 PM »
so I don't think a whole lot of people really noticed this but the other day freek made a few posts with a tiny little image at the end

here were the posts: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8
now it's kind of weird. he's removed all of the images now (but you can thank me for saving the images ;3), but the first two, he actually removed on the day that he posted them. the others didn't get removed until yesterday. you can still see the image in my quote of the first one, and satan also replied to the second, crazy replied to the third, and emgiell replied to the last. no responses, otherwise
the first two are also quite different from the rest, they have a clearly different scheme, and the sizes are different

so anyway now that he's either given up or removed them to add to the mystery, I guess this is a good time to try to figure it out

this is all of the images together, in order, enlarged:


and the originals, individually:









what does it mean?????? no clue. let's try to figure it out?????????????????? it's worth considering the fact that the last one was posted in a thread about "last messages", and he hasn't posted since then

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General Discussion / BlockParty - personal updates & future of project
« on: November 04, 2016, 09:09:18 PM »
old thread's too old, so here we are
last post I made there:

well, little update
I recently got a job. a full-time one, this time, lol. it's only supposed to last six months, but that's a pretty long time
anyway it's taking a good chunk out of the time I can work on this. 8 hours of sleep, 8 hours of work (minimum), leaves just 8 more hours for anything else. which sounds like a lot, but I give myself about 2 hours to get ready for work and to get there (it's about half an hour away), and 1 hour for lunch isn't included in those 8 hours. so now we're just down to 5 hours a day. we can take out another half hour for the trip home, and any time I work over that 8 hours (seems to be between 30 minutes and an hour normally), plus time to eat dinner.........
yeah

but there are saturdays. on sundays I have D&D obligations but that doesn't consume 100% of the time that I spend playing, nor does it take the whole day. usually 4-6 hours. so yeah weekends. and I'll try to find time to work on it at, uh, work. my job is completely unrelated to programming, but I do have a decent amount of time where I don't really have much to do, and I could eat lunch at my desk while I work on it, or something. so it's not all doom and gloom really

but on the even brighter side I guess, for anyone who cares anyway, I've finally made a git repo for it, because I really need a way to keep changes synced between my laptop and desktop now
https://github.com/foxscotch/blockparty
if you visit this link within the next like 15 minutes you won't see much, just gimme a minute, the repo's gonna link to this post so I need to make the post lol all is well

edit: also on the super bright side $$$
regular income means an extended budget!!!! that doesn't mean a whole lot for this project but you can expect a few things, like for example a dedicated domain name (still have no clue what I'd pick though, like I said before blockparty.net/us/etc were all taken ;~;), which I simply wouldn't have bothered with otherwise. maybe an upgraded VPS, although the one I have right now is pretty nice, so we'll just have to see about that

so, to begin with, that job is no longer for six months, but in fact for the foreseeable future. the work is okay and the pay is good enough for now, so when my boss asked me to stick around, I figured why not. not really a big deal in relation to this project, cus I was pretty sure that was how it was gonna go down anyway

second, no longer doing D&D. unfortunately? maybe. I miss talking to the people I played it with but I guess I don't miss the time commitment

third, if anyone has been keeping an eye on that git repo (unlikely), you may have noticed a few commits in recent weeks. not much, but more than zero I guess

and finally, I've gotten some relatively big stuff going on in my life lately. having a now-permanent job has sorta woken me up to the fact that I should probably move out soon, especially because my boyfriend wants to live with me. for that reason, saving money has become significantly more important. again, little impact on the project


but what I've really made this thread for is to talk about the shaky future of it. some people seem to be into the idea, which is great, but... it's only a few people. a website like this would be utterly pointless with just a few members. it's especially discouraging to see the state that Clan Discussion is in. the oldest post on the front page is two months old. doesn't bode well for a site about clans
I'm not giving up, forever, or whatever, but I just think for now it'll be better for me to focus on other things. I'm sure that eventually I'll get another bout of inspiration, and by then, at least I'll have this, uh, decent, codebase to start from

also you can thank hawt for sending me a pm like half an hour ago that reminded me to post this. actually kind of weird because I was thinking about how I would explain all of this earlier today


apologies to anyone who's been genuinely excited about it. I was, too

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