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Topics - VerticalHorizon

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Off Topic / hey blf i got engaged
« on: September 17, 2018, 08:39:01 AM »
he took me and some of my family out to dinner and then proposed in front of them on top of a bridge over a koi fish pond

i'd like to play a set with my band at the wedding and get a mosh pit going, but what do you guys think we should do?

also Badspot is invited pls come

Off Topic / [news] IHOP changing their name to IHOb
« on: June 06, 2018, 02:20:30 PM »

would you care for an ice cold glass of bepis with your delicious IHOb meal?

IHOP stands for "International House of Pancakes", so let's speculate as to what "b" will stand for
i'm hoping for a sweet and simple "bancakes" but it'll probably be International House of BEKFAST

Off Topic / i'm 26 today and i have spent half my life here
« on: May 25, 2018, 07:45:53 AM »
piggy backing off the title of my last birthday topic, i have officially spent half my entire life as part of this community
i know i'm not much more than a meme to some of you at this point, but whether you enjoy poking fun at me or not, i love you, i love all you guys
this is the only community i've ever meshed with, and even though i have very little in common with the community as it stands today, i still feel like this place is a significant part of my life
rather than leaving this as just another sappy love letter to Blockland, i'm going to dump a load of screenshots i've taken over the years that hold some value to me. unfortunately the hard drive with all my pre-Retail screenshots is currently dead and i don't know how likely it is that i can recover it :\


Off Topic / Word Avalanches
« on: October 05, 2017, 04:29:04 PM »
idk where this most properly belongs so i'm putting it here for now (not like it won't die instantly anyway)

a word avalanche is, as the Subreddit so concisely describes it:

"[...] a highly contrived punny sentence (or longer series of words) with an emphasis on the repetition of syllables. Holorimes are a subset of these."

the way we make these is by writing a "setup" that buries the lead- that is to say, the reader shouldn't be able to determine what the avalanche's gimmick will be until they read it. (this is not the hard rule but it makes them way more entertaining)
the avalanche will then employ puns and clever wordplay- typically using a gimmick or motif- to create a strange and funny sentence
it's a little hard to describe, so i will start by showing you some of my own avalanches

Setup: Your boyfriend, a very drunk Bam Margera, uses haunted ghost bamboo to trick you into hurting yourself with an explosion

Avalanche: A boozed Bam beau boo-bamboo boo-boo bamboozle boom

Setup: Heath and Heathrow are two men who travel by boat. Heathrow stole some blankets and Heath- who speaks in the third person- angrily tosses the blankets away and threatens to leave without Heathrow if the shop owner does not hold Heathrow accountable

Avalanche: In throes, Heath throws Heathrow's throws. Heath rose, "He either owes, or Heath rows."

Setup: The children of a man named Adolf mail him one of their dolls, but since they're in custody of his divorced wife, the doll smells like her. This bothers Adolf, so he asks his friend- who just walked in and wants to relax- to get something to mask the smell.

Avalanche: Adolescents sent Adolf a doll, a doleful sense since- in essence- Adele's scent addles senses. Dolph sits, "Ayy! Dolph" Dolph winces "A dull incense." Ends Adolf.

note that simply employing alliteration and/or rhyming doesn't really make it an avalanche, it takes more cleverness than that, and the longer the better
take a look at the subreddit i linked above if you need any more examples. i look forward to seeing what you guys come up with or don't because this is probably way too dull for this forum

Off Topic / vigilante justice on the road (rant)
« on: August 29, 2017, 09:12:50 AM »

listen, i know some people suck at driving, it sucks and i don't like it any more than you do
no one likes stuffty drivers, we're all hurtling across the pavement in 2 ton death machines just hoping other people have the pity/awareness not to slam into us, the last thing we want to worry about is some dipstuff recklessly cutting people off and blocking traffic at intersections trying to turn left from a right turn lane

i get it

but it's not up to us to "teach them a lesson"
refusing to let someone merge because they waited too long and now they're trying to cut in line is not helping anyone, it's only making it worse
driving slowly in the left lane on the highway because you are angry at people who speed is a loving richardhead thing to do (and illegal in a lot of places, including NC where I live)
yes, i wish more people used turn signals too, and i hate it when people don't use them... but refusing to make room for someone who is trying to change lanes just cause they have no turn signal on is probably just going to cause that lane to become more congested as they struggle to switch lanes. you're loving with everyone now, not just them.

i know it's not fair that we have to accommodate for dumbasses like these but that's life and it's not up to you to "educate" bad or aggressive drivers by being "that starfish" who didn't let them merge on their way to work this morning
if there are police around and someone is truly being reckless, they will probably be pulled over, and that's it, it's done

swallow your loving pride and drive in a way that helps everyone, not just the people who you think deserve accommodation
it makes traffic as a whole move more smoothly and gets everyone where they need to be more quickly


Off Topic / i'm 25 and i've spent nearly half my life here
« on: May 25, 2017, 10:27:40 AM »
and honestly, it's not really that depressing to me that out of 25 years of my life, i have spent 12 of them with blockland. there was a period in time when this community and the friends i made here were literally the only reasons why i would bother getting out of bed, and i was even talked out of suicide by a blocklander at least once. (beachbum <3) today i am celebrating the fact that i am still alive despite years of suicidal thoughts and self harm, and i am so happy to finally be living a life that portrays me the way i've always wanted to be

i'll honestly probably be here until the game and forum implode and cease to exist so hit me up some time if you ever want to play or something :)

Off Topic / Post Your Handwriting v.2XXX
« on: May 15, 2017, 02:35:54 PM »
handwriting is kinda interesting so why not!
if you prefer to write with a mouse or tablet, feel free to post that, either way it can't look much worse than mine <3

Off Topic / Neural Networks Learns to Speak Fake Japanese
« on: March 09, 2017, 10:54:07 AM »

This is probably one of the funniest things I have heard so far in 2017.


Here is the less funny (to me), less ear rape-y version using an English voice

Off Topic / Almost 12 Years Ago I Made This Community My Home
« on: February 14, 2017, 09:53:48 AM »
I've made a couple of topics like these before, but I was talking to Lalam on Facebook the other night about old Blockland memories and it refueled my powerful nostalgia for the old days.

From toddler to teenager I was homeschooled, K-8th grade. I lived really far back off the road on a big plot of land and my extended family lived hours away. My sisters- the youngest of which I am 10 years and two weeks younger than- were already out of the house by the time I was 8. That's not to say that we ever played together, because we didn't. My dad was a magician by hobby and I was his assistant, which provided me with little peeks into the outside world, to see what it was like to be a kid living on the outside who went to school and had friends. I envied these kids so much but the only times I was allowed to be social were at church, and I hated church. So, I spent probably 99% of my time playing by myself, discovering the internet and playing games. I made a friend here and there via my dad who rented land to people, but they quickly grew away from me or began to dislike me.

After I turned 11, my mom and dad were fighting more than ever, he was drinking more than ever, and I was more disconnected from my parents than ever. I spent days at a time completely alone playing by myself, sometimes not eating, just sort of withering away. I was using AIM a lot but never really felt like I was connecting with anyone. I tried joining a few other communities and never really grooving, but I discovered Blockland in 2005 and clicked immediately. Something about the game and the people playing, it just felt like I was home somewhere, finally. I had friends I talked to and played with every day. I finally felt like I was part of something. When my dad died later that year, Blockland became the only thing of any value in my life. Wake up, play Blockland for 12-24 hours, browse the forums, go to sleep, that was my entire routine for months. My friends on Blockland were the only things keeping me sane, which was the case for years afterward, talking me out of various suicidal thoughts and keeping me company.

My mom remarried soon after our business went under and we lost all of our assets so we wouldn't be homeless. He was an abusive alcoholic. I decided to try out public high school but I was so completely socially retarded that I had no idea what to do. I turned to threatening people and keeping people far away, relying on Blocklanders to keep me company instead. Every day after school I would hole up in my room playing Blockland and TF2 until bedtime, trying to stay away from my stepdad. It wasn't until my mom and I finally moved out of that hellhole and got a place of our own that my Blockland friends started pushing me to reform myself at my next high school. So I tried, and I made a couple friends, most of whom I don't really talk to anymore.

The rest is fairly uneventful and uninteresting (well, the whole thing is uninteresting, but whatever) so I will spare those details and fast forward to current day.

I still don't really have any real life friends, and I don't know most of the people here anymore, but Blockland was responsible for literally every single one of my most cherished memories as a kid and I'll never forget that. I am pushing myself every day to put myself out there and make something of myself and find happiness, and I don't think I'd be here to do that right now if it wasn't for Blockland. I guess I could say I literally owe my life to this place, which is probably pretty lame but who cares.

I'll shut up now, I doubt most will read this or care, but I felt like I needed to say it again how deeply grateful I am for this game and community. It's the only community I've ever felt really a part of and I don't see myself severing ties with you all any time soon. I definitely won't say I had a bad childhood- I always had a roof over my head, food, and clean water readily available to me, for which I am all extremely thankful- but all of that only go so far without meaningful social interaction, which I got here.

tl;dr: Blockland is responsible for the best memories I have of my childhood and provided the only meaningful social interaction I ever had for years and years and I'm a huge friend hahaahsdhasdhghffhsah.

Off Topic / Birthday celebration suggestions
« on: May 25, 2016, 08:33:43 AM »
I'm 24 today and I don't know what to do. I don't really have friends IRL and it's on a week day this year so most of my family probably won't be able to hang out.
Should I play BL? Do cartwheels through flowers? Open up a fried pork butts restaurant? Stick it in my pooper? plang loel?

Off Topic / Going to start snowboarding, advice?
« on: May 09, 2016, 08:31:58 AM »
I've been obsessed with snowboarding ever since I was a kid, and just recently one of my friends got me a snowboard as an early birthday present so I could finally experience it for myself.
It came with bindings, but I still need boots and the appropriate clothing. I keep reading two conflicting opinions on the internet;

A) Make sure your gear is perfect.
B) Gear doesn't matter as much as you think.

If anyone here also snowboards, could I get some first hand opinions? Should I worry about spending the money on good goggles, a high quality jacket, expensive pants, etc. or should I just get whatever I can find for a low enough price? I don't plan for this to be a one-off thing like "Oh that was fun, time to pawn my board", I want to do it as much as I can every Winter.

The old thread.

I know I said I was going to be documenting the process one step at a time, but I kind of forgot, so here's the next big milestone:

I was unable to complete my goal of completing laser hair removal first due to car trouble, but my breast growth has been so rapid that it can no longer be ignored. As of today, I will be presenting as female full time. No more waiting around in fear, no more pretending I have all the time in the world to prepare, I am going to jump head first into the life I should have been living for the past 23 years. Thank you to everyone who has shown me love during my transition, and I'm sorry about being an overly sensitive friend before. To those of you who are still annoyed with me, all I can say is: I'm sorry, I won't do it again, I was foolish and I let my emotions work through me, please don't hate me.

I've spent almost 11 years of my life here so I figured I'd keep you all updated cause- even though I rarely post anymore and most of you didn't know me back then- I will always see you as my second family and my second home.

"Call me Caitlyn a friend Bruce Puddintane turbo_camel6 Vert."

Off Topic / Tab For a Cause
« on: June 29, 2015, 09:55:09 AM »
All you do is install the browser plugin on Firefox or Chrome (Or both, like I did) and it will replace your New Tab page with one that looks like this:

(Click for full size)

The page is customizable and has a nice little stats menu to show you how many tabs you open throughout the week and a leader board.
Every time you see this page you get a heart, which is worth $0.01, basically redirecting Tab For a Cause's AdSense money straight into a little fund of your own to give to charity.
Once you have some hearts to give, you donate them to one of the charities on their list of participating charities. The way donations work is, from their own FAQ:

"When you donate a Heart, you are essentially casting a vote for money to be given to your selected charity. At the end of each quarter, we take all of the money raised through Tab for a Cause and divide it amongst the charities based on the number of Hearts that were donated to each cause during the quarter."

I just made my first donation today; $15 to the Human Rights Watch

Click here to get the plugin and sign up.
It costs absolutely nothing and they don't ask you for any real money. It's all done via opening a new tab.

Drama / Who here dislikes trans people?
« on: June 25, 2015, 02:42:36 PM »
I'm not making this thread to bitch you out or try to educate you, I just want a consolidated list of people to avoid in the future.
Last night I was made very aware that many of you don't like me or think I'm an idiot for the fact that I'm transgender, and that's fine, just please let me know who you are so I can stay away from you.

I don't think it's particularly fun to have a server of 30 people all yelling at me about how stupid/retarded I am just because they don't like how I live my life. You can ask DragonoidSlayer; I didn't even say anything to trigger the attack, I was just minding my own business quietly helping them test their new game mode when someone asked me if I was a "tranny" and it all went downhill from there. I kept my cool, I was terse and straight forward, I didn't insult anybody, I just tried to defend myself briefly and left.

If any of you here feel you would do the same to me if you were in their shoes please let me know so I can avoid you.

Off Topic / Funny/embarrassing stories
« on: May 04, 2015, 04:33:09 PM »
The gross stories topic got me to thinking, "Hmm, we want other peoples' stories to read on the podcast sometimes, but only 4 people listen to it... hey maybe Blockland has some stories we could read. Man I wish I could suck some richard right now." so here we are.

If you have a funny or embarrassing TRUE story about you or a friend that you'd like us to read on the show, you can post it here along with whatever name you'd like us to refer to you as. There is no limit on gross, weird, or disturbing content, just make sure it's funny and not too long (and believable because I know at least one of you will just make stuff up.)

Episodes are posted here:

As well as on iTunes and Stitcher.

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