Messages

2656

Forum Games / Re: DIPLOMACY: The (Forum) Board Game

« on: July 15, 2015, 11:42:31 PM »

I'll join as the Ottomans I guess. Never played one of these things before for fear that I would forget up horribly, but it can't be that bad, right? Rules seem simple enough.

2657

Forum Games / Re: BLOODLUST [NewGame+]

« on: July 15, 2015, 11:31:19 PM »

Have a nice nap at your home

You drive home blindly in the dark. The streets are empty and devoid of life.



Suddenly, a flaming pit from Hell opens up and Joseph Stalin slowly rises from it.

"Capitalist Pig! Stalin will have his revenge on the First World!" Stalin's booming voice shouts.

Protagonist isn't having any of that stuff and is determined to kill Stalin here and now!

armed with MAGNIFICENT MOUSTACHE
YOU are moderately wounded

9:00 PM
Weather Effect: Extreme fog + Thunderstorm

WEAPONS: ALIEN RAYGUN (1/10 shots) PERSONAL M4 CARBINE(1/30 rounds) TRAITOR JOE'S CUSTOMIZED 1911 (7/7 rounds, 1 .45 mag) JEWBOT'S RAINBOW SWORD SNIPER CANNON (1/3 rounds) TRANQUILIZER PISTOL (2 darts/3 special darts) NIGHTSTICK TEMPLAR SWORD TASER SHOTGUN (4/4 rounds, 0 shells left) SYRINGE REMINGTON 870 (8/8 rounds, birdshot ammo loaded)

OTHER ITEMS: SAXOPHONE BLOODLUST CONTROL PILLS x1 MIND CONTROL KIT x1 ALIEN BLOOD INFECTED ORGANS BOOK (ACTION HERO GUIDE) BOOK (BLOODLUST CONTROL) HEALING (FIRST AID KIT) STYLIN HAT TEMPLAR ARMOR DAMAGED SMARTPHONE STAB VEST SAXOPHONE STYLIN' HAT BLOODSTAINED ORANGE JUMPSUIT

$3500 IN CASH.
BLOODLUST: 0%

2658

Games / Re: iconic games that you've never played before?

« on: July 15, 2015, 11:26:46 PM »

Never got to play Goldeneye 007, Perfect Dark, FEAR, Splatoon, Manhunt(1 or 2), Soldier Of Fortune 2, or Half Life 1.

2659

Forum Games / Re: BLOODLUST [NewGame+]

« on: July 15, 2015, 11:23:06 PM »

Summon the powers of demoknight and the spam squad
Become the ultimate lord demoman
"There can be only one!"
slice his head off with the rainbow sword

You turn into a demoknight and charge screaming at the Hooded Figure with your rainbow sword! The Hooded Figure braces himself(?) and executes a backflip kick to your face, knocking you to the ground again! He(?) raises his Five SeveN at you while you lay on the ground...

Charge him. Fire sniper cannon when its pressed against his gut.

You whip out your Sniper Cannon out of hammerspace and press it up against the gut of the hooded figure before firing!

Hooded Figure goes flying out of the Grocery Store and into the stratosphere!

ACHIVEMENT UNLOCKED: Just like Joseph Stalin
Requirements: Punt someone into space.

You look at the carnage in the grocery store. Several dead police officers, either on-duty or off-duty. Dozens of dead civilians with gruesome entry wounds and exit wounds on their foreheads. Whoever the murderer was, he(?) was a professional. Hell, he even Mozambique Drilled half of the victims here. Two in the chest, one in the head.

You take a look outside and see that it is extremely dark outside, and a thunderstorm has set in. The only light is from the full moon and the occasional half-broken street lamp. A heavy fog has set in.

YOU are moderately wounded

9:00 PM
Weather Effect: Extreme fog + Thunderstorm

WEAPONS: ALIEN RAYGUN (1/10 shots) PERSONAL M4 CARBINE(1/30 rounds) TRAITOR JOE'S CUSTOMIZED 1911 (7/7 rounds, 1 .45 mag) JEWBOT'S RAINBOW SWORD SNIPER CANNON (1/3 rounds) TRANQUILIZER PISTOL (2 darts/3 special darts) NIGHTSTICK TEMPLAR SWORD TASER SHOTGUN (4/4 rounds, 0 shells left) SYRINGE REMINGTON 870 (8/8 rounds, birdshot ammo loaded)

OTHER ITEMS: SAXOPHONE BLOODLUST CONTROL PILLS x1 MIND CONTROL KIT x1 ALIEN BLOOD INFECTED ORGANS BOOK (ACTION HERO GUIDE) BOOK (BLOODLUST CONTROL) HEALING (FIRST AID KIT) STYLIN HAT TEMPLAR ARMOR DAMAGED SMARTPHONE STAB VEST SAXOPHONE STYLIN' HAT BLOODSTAINED ORANGE JUMPSUIT

$3500 IN CASH.
BLOODLUST: 0%

2660

Forum Games / Re: BLOODLUST [NewGame+]

« on: July 15, 2015, 09:32:49 PM »

Blast him to hell

Protagonist fires a burst from the M4 at Hooded Figure!
Hooded Figure leaps behind another checkout table, dodging MOST of the bullets!
Hooded Figure rushes to Protagonist and backflip kicks him in the face! Protagonist is sent backflipping into a ice box!
Hooded Figure retreats towards the front door, drops a rectangular object by it, and takes out a switch before activating it!

Hooded Figure(Wounded) (Fleeing Grocery Store: 1 Turn Left) armed with Suppressed Five SeveN w/ Laser Sight
YOU are moderately wounded


ERRANDS
Finish getting Groceries (1/2 done)

WEAPONS: ALIEN RAYGUN (1/10 shots) PERSONAL M4 CARBINE(1/30 rounds) TRAITOR JOE'S CUSTOMIZED 1911 (7/7 rounds, 1 .45 mag) JEWBOT'S RAINBOW SWORD SNIPER CANNON (1/3 rounds) TRANQUILIZER PISTOL (2 darts/3 special darts) NIGHTSTICK TEMPLAR SWORD TASER SHOTGUN (4/4 rounds, 0 shells left) SYRINGE REMINGTON 870 (8/8 rounds, birdshot ammo loaded)

OTHER ITEMS: SAXOPHONE BLOODLUST CONTROL PILLS x1 MIND CONTROL KIT x1 ALIEN BLOOD INFECTED ORGANS BOOK (ACTION HERO GUIDE) BOOK (BLOODLUST CONTROL) HEALING (FIRST AID KIT) STYLIN HAT TEMPLAR ARMOR DAMAGED SMARTPHONE STAB VEST SAXOPHONE STYLIN' HAT BLOODSTAINED ORANGE JUMPSUIT

$3500 IN CASH.
BLOODLUST: 0%

2661

Forum Games / Re: BLOODLUST [NewGame+]

« on: July 15, 2015, 09:23:02 PM »

"It's time to see the truth!" Aim at his head, brush your manbangs away and fire like an anime badass. "Take that!"

"Its time to see the truth!"

Protagonist fires away with a M4 at the Hooded Figure, hitting the wounded police officers several times in the upper torso and neck, killing him.
Hooded Figure leaps behind a checkout table and throws a cash register at Protagonist!
Protagonist is knocked to the floor briefly!
Hooded Figure says: "If you're that persistent.... You asked for it!"
Hooded Figure blasts away at Protagonist with a Five SeveN and pauses to reload!

Hooded Figure armed with Suppressed Five SeveN w/ Laser Sight
YOU are somewhat wounded


ERRANDS
Finish getting Groceries (1/2 done)

WEAPONS: ALIEN RAYGUN (1/10 shots) PERSONAL M4 CARBINE(6/30 rounds) TRAITOR JOE'S CUSTOMIZED 1911 (7/7 rounds, 1 .45 mag) JEWBOT'S RAINBOW SWORD SNIPER CANNON (1/3 rounds) TRANQUILIZER PISTOL (2 darts/3 special darts) NIGHTSTICK TEMPLAR SWORD TASER SHOTGUN (4/4 rounds, 0 shells left) SYRINGE REMINGTON 870 (8/8 rounds, birdshot ammo loaded)

OTHER ITEMS: SAXOPHONE BLOODLUST CONTROL PILLS x1 MIND CONTROL KIT x1 ALIEN BLOOD INFECTED ORGANS BOOK (ACTION HERO GUIDE) BOOK (BLOODLUST CONTROL) HEALING (FIRST AID KIT) STYLIN HAT TEMPLAR ARMOR DAMAGED SMARTPHONE STAB VEST SAXOPHONE STYLIN' HAT BLOODSTAINED ORANGE JUMPSUIT

$3500 IN CASH.
BLOODLUST: 0%

2662

Forum Games / Re: BLOODLUST [NewGame+]

« on: July 15, 2015, 08:47:49 PM »

SCREAM AS YOU KICK DOWN THE DOOR AND SPRAY BULLETS
also how do people not notice the easily 200+lb of weaponry on you

Communist Magic I have no idea. I never thought of it, either.

Protagonist lets out a battle cry, kicks down the bathroom door, and sprays M4 bullets into the rest of the Grocery Store!
Hooded Figure leaps for cover!
Hooded Figure grabs a wounded police officer off the floor and uses him as a human shield while he(?) retreats!

Hooded Figure(Taking human shield) armed with Suppressed Five SeveN w/ Laser Sight
YOU are lightly wounded


ERRANDS
Finish getting Groceries (1/2 done)

WEAPONS: ALIEN RAYGUN (1/10 shots) PERSONAL M4 CARBINE(10/30 rounds) TRAITOR JOE'S CUSTOMIZED 1911 (7/7 rounds, 1 .45 mag) JEWBOT'S RAINBOW SWORD SNIPER CANNON (1/3 rounds) TRANQUILIZER PISTOL (2 darts/3 special darts) NIGHTSTICK TEMPLAR SWORD TASER SHOTGUN (4/4 rounds, 0 shells left) SYRINGE REMINGTON 870 (8/8 rounds, birdshot ammo loaded)

OTHER ITEMS: SAXOPHONE BLOODLUST CONTROL PILLS x1 MIND CONTROL KIT x1 ALIEN BLOOD INFECTED ORGANS BOOK (ACTION HERO GUIDE) BOOK (BLOODLUST CONTROL) HEALING (FIRST AID KIT) STYLIN HAT TEMPLAR ARMOR DAMAGED SMARTPHONE STAB VEST SAXOPHONE STYLIN' HAT BLOODSTAINED ORANGE JUMPSUIT

$3500 IN CASH.
BLOODLUST: 0%

2663

Forum Games / Re: BLOODLUST

« on: July 15, 2015, 08:40:47 PM »

SCREAM 'FREE love'

"FREE love IN HERE!" You shriek, attracting the murderer's attention. He(?) bursts in, caps you twice in the chest, and finishes you off with a headshot.

GAME OVER
Really?

2664

Forum Games / Re: BLOODLUST [NewGame+]

« on: July 15, 2015, 08:38:14 PM »

Nah, do push kicks.
OT: HIDE.

You stay in the bathroom, gun aimed at the door. You listen closely to the noises you can pick up....

*FWIP* *FWIP* *FWIP* *THUD*

"P-Please don't kill m*FWIP FWIP* "Please Lord, we've done nothing wron*FWIP* *THUD*

"Why are you doing this? Please don't! I did nothing wrong to deserve this!" *FWIP FWIP FWIP* "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!" *THUD*

"HELP! HEEEEELP! HELP ME! HEL-" *FWIP* *THUD*

"NO! NO NO NO NO NO---" *FWIP* *SPLORT*

"Who the hell are you-- HEY! DROP THE WEAP---" *FWIP*

Someone is using a suppressed weapon to massacre the entire grocery store! The murderer must be getting closer to you, judging by how the noises are getting louder and louder!

YOU are lightly wounded


ERRANDS
Finish getting Groceries (1/2 done)

WEAPONS: ALIEN RAYGUN (1/10 shots) PERSONAL M4 CARBINE(20/30 rounds) TRAITOR JOE'S CUSTOMIZED 1911 (7/7 rounds, 1 .45 mag) JEWBOT'S RAINBOW SWORD SNIPER CANNON (1/3 rounds) TRANQUILIZER PISTOL (2 darts/3 special darts) NIGHTSTICK TEMPLAR SWORD TASER SHOTGUN (4/4 rounds, 0 shells left) SYRINGE REMINGTON 870 (8/8 rounds, birdshot ammo loaded)

OTHER ITEMS: SAXOPHONE BLOODLUST CONTROL PILLS x1 MIND CONTROL KIT x1 ALIEN BLOOD INFECTED ORGANS BOOK (ACTION HERO GUIDE) BOOK (BLOODLUST CONTROL) HEALING (FIRST AID KIT) STYLIN HAT TEMPLAR ARMOR DAMAGED SMARTPHONE STAB VEST SAXOPHONE STYLIN' HAT BLOODSTAINED ORANGE JUMPSUIT

$3500 IN CASH.
BLOODLUST: 0%

2665

Forum Games / Re: BLOODLUST

« on: July 15, 2015, 08:14:39 PM »

suddenly Ganados

spin kick the stuff out of them.

Spin kick the stuff out of an empty grocery store?

2666

Forum Games / Re: BLOODLUST [NewGame+]

« on: July 15, 2015, 08:00:02 PM »

Pull out your shotgun and intimidate him

"Bitch, be cool." You whip out a shotgun only for the Black Belt to karate chop you in the throat.

Grab the mans arm in a smooth fashion and quickly but gently fold it behind he's back.  Then twist the arm so that the man is begging you to stop.

This should give us some negative bloodlust.

Black Belt agrees to stop attacking and runs away screaming for mommy!

Bloodlust minimum already reached

Find Gunslinger and Metagamer.

You run back to the metagamer HQ and find both Metagamer Guard and the Gunslinger. The Gunslinger vaguely remembers you, but refuses to tag along with you, as he has a private funeral to attend. You run back to the grocery store and do some shopping. Halfway through, you use the bathroom. Once you finish using the bathroom, the entire grocery store goes silent for some reason. Something is wrong.

YOU are lightly wounded


ERRANDS
Finish getting Groceries (1/2 done)

WEAPONS: ALIEN RAYGUN (1/10 shots) PERSONAL M4 CARBINE(20/30 rounds) TRAITOR JOE'S CUSTOMIZED 1911 (7/7 rounds, 1 .45 mag) JEWBOT'S RAINBOW SWORD SNIPER CANNON (1/3 rounds) TRANQUILIZER PISTOL (2 darts/3 special darts) NIGHTSTICK TEMPLAR SWORD TASER SHOTGUN (4/4 rounds, 0 shells left) SYRINGE REMINGTON 870 (8/8 rounds, birdshot ammo loaded)

OTHER ITEMS: SAXOPHONE BLOODLUST CONTROL PILLS x1 MIND CONTROL KIT x1 ALIEN BLOOD INFECTED ORGANS BOOK (ACTION HERO GUIDE) BOOK (BLOODLUST CONTROL) HEALING (FIRST AID KIT) STYLIN HAT TEMPLAR ARMOR DAMAGED SMARTPHONE STAB VEST SAXOPHONE STYLIN' HAT BLOODSTAINED ORANGE JUMPSUIT

$3500 IN CASH.
BLOODLUST: 0%

2667

Off Topic / Re: what is the above user known for

« on: July 15, 2015, 07:45:43 PM »

is probably a garden

Giving birth to the "Jack off then leave" meme on the BLF apparently

2668

Forum Games / Re: BLOODLUST [NewGame+]

« on: July 15, 2015, 07:41:01 PM »

Ask Traitor Joe about the ACNRHKLAHBSLFGSG(L).

"I don't know what that is, but it sounds more like a Government conspiracy!"

Read the bloodlust control book, and then say "Yes."

The Bloodlust Control book gives a ton of useful tips for managing bloodlust... But your Bloodlust meter is at 0%. Damn.

The random stranger starts ranting about how evil the Conservative Crime Squad is before handing you a flyer for the Liberal Crime Squad.

stuff on his face

You coldrooster the man in the face and attempt to stuff on him.

"Hold it right there!"

A man runs up to you and socks you in the face before trying to beat the stuff out of you.

Summon the rest of your Templar stuff. As it finishes the look, and Makes you badass. (Because Magic.)
To clear that up, Templars are known to be Magical Knights.

Black Belt armed with BARE HANDS
Random Man
YOU are lightly wounded


ERRANDS
Get Groceries

WEAPONS: ALIEN RAYGUN (1/10 shots) PERSONAL M4 CARBINE(20/30 rounds) TRAITOR JOE'S CUSTOMIZED 1911 (7/7 rounds, 1 .45 mag) JEWBOT'S RAINBOW SWORD SNIPER CANNON (1/3 rounds) TRANQUILIZER PISTOL (2 darts/3 special darts) NIGHTSTICK TEMPLAR SWORD TASER SHOTGUN (4/4 rounds, 0 shells left) SYRINGE REMINGTON 870 (8/8 rounds, birdshot ammo loaded)

OTHER ITEMS: SAXOPHONE BLOODLUST CONTROL PILLS x1 MIND CONTROL KIT x1 ALIEN BLOOD INFECTED ORGANS BOOK (ACTION HERO GUIDE) BOOK (BLOODLUST CONTROL) HEALING (FIRST AID KIT) STYLIN HAT TEMPLAR ARMOR DAMAGED SMARTPHONE STAB VEST SAXOPHONE STYLIN' HAT BLOODSTAINED ORANGE JUMPSUIT

$3500 IN CASH.
BLOODLUST: 0%

2669

Forum Games / Re: BLOODLUST [NewGame+]

« on: July 15, 2015, 03:09:09 PM »

Go to the post office, mail the package, and go to the grocery store.

You go to the post office, mail a package, and witness the Post Office exploding due to a Self Delete bomber a few minutes after leaving. At least it wasn't a drone strike this time. You arrive at the grocery store and a random man runs up to you.

"Do you want to hear something disturbing?"

Random Man
YOU are lightly wounded


ERRANDS
Get Groceries

WEAPONS: ALIEN RAYGUN (1/10 shots) PERSONAL M4 CARBINE(20/30 rounds) TRAITOR JOE'S CUSTOMIZED 1911 (7/7 rounds, 1 .45 mag) JEWBOT'S RAINBOW SWORD SNIPER CANNON (1/3 rounds) TRANQUILIZER PISTOL (2 darts/3 special darts) NIGHTSTICK TASER SHOTGUN (4/4 rounds, 0 shells left) SYRINGE REMINGTON 870 (8/8 rounds, birdshot ammo loaded)

OTHER ITEMS: SAXOPHONE BLOODLUST CONTROL PILLS x1 MIND CONTROL KIT x1 ALIEN BLOOD INFECTED ORGANS BOOK (ACTION HERO GUIDE) BOOK (BLOODLUST CONTROL) HEALING (FIRST AID KIT) STYLIN HAT DAMAGED SMARTPHONE STAB VEST SAXOPHONE STYLIN' HAT BLOODSTAINED ORANGE JUMPSUIT

$3500 IN CASH.
BLOODLUST: 0%

2670

Forum Games / Re: BLOODLUST [NewGame+]

« on: July 15, 2015, 02:15:07 PM »

Search the protester's corpses for money

$500 Acquired. Holy stuff.

You get this odd feeling that the accident is about to explode, so run in and save as many injured people as you can.

You go back to the accident to witness it has already exploded, so you heroically pull some civilians out of the fire and feel good inside. You receive $3000 from one of the civilians, which happens to be a CEO. The other civilian, Traitor Joe, thanks you for saving him from a government conspiracy to take him out. He continues rambling about how the government is corrupt.

YOU are lightly wounded


ERRANDS
Mail a package at the Post Office
Get Groceries

WEAPONS: ALIEN RAYGUN (1/10 shots) PERSONAL M4 CARBINE(20/30 rounds) TRAITOR JOE'S CUSTOMIZED 1911 (7/7 rounds, 1 .45 mag) JEWBOT'S RAINBOW SWORD SNIPER CANNON (1/3 rounds) TRANQUILIZER PISTOL (2 darts/3 special darts) NIGHTSTICK TASER SHOTGUN (4/4 rounds, 0 shells left) SYRINGE REMINGTON 870 (8/8 rounds, birdshot ammo loaded)

OTHER ITEMS: SAXOPHONE BLOODLUST CONTROL PILLS x1 MIND CONTROL KIT x1 ALIEN BLOOD INFECTED ORGANS BOOK (ACTION HERO GUIDE) BOOK (BLOODLUST CONTROL) HEALING (FIRST AID KIT) STYLIN HAT DAMAGED SMARTPHONE STAB VEST SAXOPHONE STYLIN' HAT BLOODSTAINED ORANGE JUMPSUIT

$3500 IN CASH.
BLOODLUST: 0%