Java Will Not Work on my Computer.

[JD]

Well, as you can probably assume from my thread title, Java does not work on my computer.
And now you're probably asking 'well jeez why didn't you already get it fixed,' well that's because I have just not really needed it until now when it's gotten to the point where it severely agitates the loving hell out of me when I try to play a Java-based game like Minecraft or Runescape.
I can play Minecraft, but only the standalone executable file, (I can't say for certain why but obviously it has to do with the fact that it's not being run through a browser.)
I just recently tried running the server hosting program for Minecraft, and found out that that too, does not run, because it requires Javascript.
If I try playing Minecraft or Runescape in my browser, it crashes. The program for hosting servers constantly gives me this error (see attached image)
and I've tried everything that I've read (update Java/uninstall+reinstall, etc) and it just doesn't work. It annoys the stuff out of me.
My specs:
OS: Win7 Home Premium 64bit
Processor: AMD Phenom II x4 965 @3.4GHz
RAM: (dunno why it matters but whatever better safe than sorry) 12288MB (yes, 12GB)
I doubt what harddrive I have really makes a difference, so if anyone could help me refrain from tearing my loving eyeballs out I'd greatly appreciate it. Kthx

tl;dr java doesn't run; normal computer; updatedreinstalledetc loving help me please

Edit: oh yeah herp derp and my GPU is ATI Radeon 5700 w/approx. 4GB memory

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[steve5451]

12288MB (yes, 12GB)

Who the hell needs this much RAM?
And sorry for this not being relevant to the topic.

[JD]

Who the hell needs this much RAM?
And sorry for this not being relevant to the topic.

People who produce music lol

[UncleNinja]

What does the error actually say? I can see the tail end of it, but that's about it.

Javascript.

Javascript is not Java.

The only real thing in common between Java and Javascript is their names.

[JD]

What does the error actually say? I can see the tail end of it, but that's about it.
Javascript is not Java.

Every time I try getting a screenshot, it just gets that top part. I'm going to keep trying though.
also k lol they aren't the same thing, that's great

The tail end isn't actually the error, but it does say '[INFO] generating new properties file'
The error message (which was a bitch to get a screenshot of) is attached.

[Dropshock]

Run it in administrator mode? That's my guess.

[JD]

I checked every available option and I can't. Is there something I'm doing wrong? I know how to run stuff as an administrator, but I don't see the option and I can't even if I go into the properties of the file.
Or, do you mean actually run Java as an administrator? Because I think I do by default.

[JD]

Bump.
Same deal.

[Azzurolix]

run in windows 98 compability mode

That's why Minecraft wasn't working for me :o

[Smash Fan]

RAM: 12288MB (yes, 12GB)

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HHHHH

[JD]

run in windows 98 compability mode

That's why Minecraft wasn't working for me :o

You mean run my browser in compatability mode? :s
Or Java? Or what?

[Azzurolix]

You mean run my browser in compatability mode? :s
Or Java? Or what?

well you know Minecraft has a launcher, right? Launch that in 98 compmode if it's minecraft. If it's runescape or whatever game you play try running the exe or .jav file in compmode.

[JD]

I know that, I've been doing that without using compatibility mode. It just doesn't work in my browser with Java. Neither does Runescape. And if it's another game how would I even be able to get the .exe or .jav?

[Azzurolix]

I know that, I've been doing that without using compatibility mode. It just doesn't work in my browser with Java. Neither does Runescape. And if it's another game how would I even be able to get the .exe or .jav?

I was just trying to give you some tips. I'm not customer support :C

[JD]

I know man lol
that's the issue though.. nothing I try works. :\ I'm stuck. I need help lol