Author Topic: Short creepy-ish story.  (Read 547 times)

My friend and I did this in about 40 minutes at lunch today.


You’re in your bedroom. You’ve just had dinner, which was bland as usual: your mother cooks like she’s on heroin (which is probably true, knowing her). You look in the mirror and spot something near the window. You walk up to it, hearing someone pull into the driveway down the street.  You pull back the curtains, and your heart jumps and then drops into your stomach. Someone is staring at you with a featureless face. There’s a noise, a whimper, and you realise you want to run. You can’t move. Your feet...if you look away, it’ll leap at you. But its eyes – where are its eyes? It’s glaring at you, you feel it, you know it, but it doesn’t have eyes.
Your hands snatch the curtains and swiftly yank them across. It’s just my imagination, you tell yourself. Just my imagination. Not there, it doesn’t exist, it doesn’t exist..!
There’s a sound, a smash, just in front of you, and the curtains begin to sway in the night breeze.
You take a step back. You take another step back. Then you run. You can’t swallow, your throat’s gone dry, and your bare feet are thumping against the landing. You hear a howl, the most threatening, spine-chilling, nerve-wracking sound you’ve heard since the window smashing. The howl calls for you, baying for your blood.
Your parents! You scamper into their room, almost tripping over the carpet. You drag back the covers, ready for their comforting embrace-
But they’re not there. Just the cold bed sheet, horribly empty without your parents’ bodies to fill it.
Above the thumping of your heart, you hear laughter downstairs. Laughter, eerily cheerful and menacing. Laughter that could belong to a child.
That thought reminds you that have a sister to look after, that despite this madness you have a responsibility. You make your way to her bedroom, edging away from the staircase, and reach her bedroom door.
You open it a crack. Just a smidgen, nothing more. Then relief washes over you as you see the silhouette of a little girl standing by her window, gazing out, unperturbed.
The silhouette turns, and the moonlight shows the truth. A faceless creature, wearing your sister’s nightgown and fluffy slippers. It’s smiling at you, triumphantly with features that don’t exist.
You scream and run and although you may be a devout atheist, you can’t help but pray for your own safety, the front door is not an option, you don’t want to know what the noise downstairs is. You run for the bathroom, you can climb out the window there.
As you reach for the window handle, the faceless monstrosity is visible in the mirror, you spin around to face it, and try to scream, but no sound comes out, there’s nothing there. You try not to break eye contact with the faceless reflection, well, rather one-sided eye-contact. You lift your hand to wipe the sweat from your face, as you do so, so does the reflection.




As I said, only 40 minutes were spent on this and it's not finished, but we probably won't finish it, so I though I'd share what we did.
Writers:

Sam - responsible for the absurd amount of times the word "faceless" was used. Also, vocabulary.
Myself- plot and stuff.- I don't use my name here because I don't want my friends judging my work. But you guys can keep that to yourselves.

Creepy-ish?
Anyway, very nice.

Not very scary and pretty badly written. I guess its ok since it was rushed.

i was just relieved it didnt end with an "and then i woke up".
really neat story, but i couldnt picture a "featureless" face. does it have a chin or eyelashes? or did you mean its a pale face with the expression  .__.  on it? more detail would be appreciated.
i dont know why but i expected it to end with "then i woke up" , im so so glad he just found out the pale face in the mirror was his own :).