Write a lengthy letter detailing how putrid and puerile the assignment is. Purchase 4 bagels. Curl up the letter and thread it through the four bagels. Apply duct tape liberally. Set it on fire, then present it to your teacher. Flee the premises. Kill a man. Harvest his organs. Cross the border. Eat his heart atop an Aztec pyramid. Cut out your own still-beating heart. Crush it to a pulp as your vision fades to black.