Ok now I finished listening to it (before I was about halfway through it).
So things I got from it...
-Get rid of "forewarnings" because readers(or actually listeners)
-Mummy convention = unrealistic and hard to imagine
-Needs moar character descriptions to care for them and their actions.
-Needs setting description as no one knows where the hell things are.
-Ending was okay(except I noticed the "eyes were pure red and were bleeding out" I don't think it needs the second were)
-The "Jill saw bandages fly off", I thought was correct as if you're trying to describe something you saw, do you say
"DUDE I just saw this guy jump off a building"
or
"DUDE I just saw this guy jumped off a building"
Swholli, I absolutely love you now :D