Part one was in English, part two I typed up just now:
After the big toilet disaster of 1812 the confederation of non American states stated their plans to get the s(h)ituation cleaned up for the masses passing the gasses. They embarked on the journey by swabbing a q-tip clan through the mean streets of a rich neighborhood with white fences Afroman. After seeing the trouble that the migrant workers were having armed with mere q-tips the Wu Tang Association declared war on the non America stating that the killer bees sold 50 gold 60 platinum and were going to come at them for the displacement of the many q-tippers as is called by the best buy workers union of Thailand. The thai men armed with the eight limbs joined in the battalion of the shaolin shadow boxers and rushed to the non America for battle. Their clinches unmatched, the first battle of Toilet (pronounced “poopy”, the fallen city of Quito) resulted in a massive loss of blood and ribcages for the non American soldier front 2. The imposed Ecuadorian tribespeople of the former Quito emerged from the underground where capybaras and palm trees were plenty and joined in with the ranks of the muay thai force (they called it “mucho thai” as a joke lol) and picked up the art of shaolin sticky stickfighting, a more advanced third cousin of the stickfighting the tribesmen used in their great capybara hunts of the old. As they sneezed on the sticks in order to ready them for battle the poop poop parashooter force rushed in from over the sky and laid a lot of big stinkers on the citypeople. Over 10,000 people threw up on the streets, the deadliest flatual attack in the (sh/c)i(t/tt)y’s history. The thai leader Quan Chi was unFaZed but had to round the Ecuadorian fightguys who were contemplating desertion and pooping on the Thai compound as well. Lucky, the wu dank arrived and out from the sky emerged thousands of shalom shadow hedgehogs (my Oc, stop showing everyone my deviantart Kevin) began to crush the non American ranks with the sheer originality of the OC which is a jet black risqué recolor of sanic, the god of the thai people. Their leader fell when Raekwon the Chef of the Wu Dang cooked him up in a pot of stew which the impoverished Ecuadorian people ate. The battle over, the Ecuadorians thanked the oriental fighters and the Africans and first rebuilt the reclaimed quito with a town hut of hay and sticks as was customary in the ecuadoorian traditions. Ecuador would rise once more as the meme central in the bicentennial of the poopcracy, a distinguished klan.
PART TWO
All was well in the recovering city of Quito, formerly Toilet (pronounced Poopy) of the non American confederate. All was well until the builder roberto Blue Meanie ran out of the mortar. That was normally okay, as donkey scat (called “dulce de leche” by the local shaman chefs) was used historically to build the great Manahandayobba temple of 1603 under tribeperson Wilsong el Mejor. The problem was, they were fresh out of donkey scat as they'd used it in the preparation of the town stew because the townspeople were very hungry. In desperate need for some sort of mortar, the townspeople resorted to using boogers as mortar. However, being Ecuadorians, they mistakenly scraped their nasal septums, causing a large outbreak of seriously bad nosebleeds. With the population now in danger, a non American spy informed the grand leader of the crCIA and he then ordered a large order of 25,000 large fry and then a small expeditionary force of juggalo poop specialists to reclaim the city and then advance towards the great toilet empire of Chilli. The jewgalos advancing, the townspeople had no choice but to release the hairy odorous stickfighters that were kept dormant in the underground temple of Sucio-Sanchez. These fightmen were kept in a solution of methbrown towndehyde collected from the scat of capybara women and pebbles, the most advanced technology of the ecuadorian people. The ranks released, they rushed in a great P-P formation at the attacking juggalo stink invaders. They fought hard, but the end came when the liutenant of the hairy stickmen was smeared across the face by a marauding stinkfighter. With horrible pinkeye, he had no choice but to surrender and perform the ceremonial honorable Self Delete of the Ecuadorian elite warriors: to perform a poop-dance and then remove one's own colon using an obsidian knife with a hilt of solidified capybara dung; to then stir-fry and eat as much of it as possible before death. The city was lost, and countless other conflicts erupted around the world with the now confident non Americans being confident enough to take them, as if the great stinker Chilli was not in enough danger as is! The Wu Tank was recovering its losses and the tie dye fighters had a great case of diarrhea in its country, causing enormous flooding. With the majority of southeast Asia covered in flooding poop, there was little hope from a great ally...
