The concept is okay, but it's a little choppy. I would suggest revising it, or something. The wording and the overall flow of it is just kinda off, like it doesn't connect properly. Interesting idea though, if not unoriginal. Screw that, it's unoriginal as hell. Try to come up with something a little more unique. Really? A lone player that's like the original but modified impossibly? Blood/claw marks? Messed up colors?
Also, the number of times you restarted your computer, had to reinstall, all that stuff, was made to feel like it took no time. It all seemed a little too convenient.
You haven't heard of that player before? Of course not, there's thousands of players. You're not going recognize every one of them.
I could go on, but I'll stop there. It's a good start.
