I don't grant myself stuff, for the record. Not that it's important, but even though I'm an admin, I play the game just like everyone else.
Anyway, the only conditions under which I can give items back to users is if the reason for losing the items was due to the server malfunctioning, or a serious griefing incident within an established town or city. Under the given circumstances, I'm afraid you have nobody to blame but yourself for losing much of your progress. Just because Zacks left you alone in the nether doesn't mean he pushed you into the lava or something. If you were ill-equipped to be surviving in the nether, that's your own fault.
I'm sorry to hear you're upset about this, but there's no action for me to take that would be fair to the rest of the users. Now seriously, calm down, show some maturity, and perhaps start rebuilding your lost equipment. If you can't manage to contain your rage, I'll be forced to eject you from the server, and I don't want to do that. So maybe go take a walk outside and calm down.