squartle is a gay pokephiliac and i have the information to prove it
Since I'm already stuffting my whole loving life down the toilet, I decided in my infinite wisdom tonight to finally let loose on the forums here and tell you all how I really loving think, and it's so funny you'll loving stuff yourself like I almost did three times today because I've got loving BLOODY DIARRHEA LOL.
First up on the chopping block, I'm smarter than you. No way, it's true. Due to the law of averages, the vast majority of people reading this are probably ready to rebuke me in some funny way which will make me laugh greatly, but the fact is it's true. Why? I don't need no forgetin' statistics, I just am. I aced high school, I aced college, and I'm acing my whole life right now. I'm running circles around my entire editorial board at my newspaper, and my friend boss knows I'm smarter than her, but she's a skinny whiny Jew who thinks she knows better than everybody because she comes from Kansas and reads The New York Times. forget that. I'm the only one keeping that goddamn piece of stuff rag in business and she loving knows it, which is why she felt threatened by me today and decided to ream me out for the headlines I write at night: BAWWWW they're too loving inaccurate! They're too loving inappropriate! loving little whore.
Second up, hunters have no loving rights. If you're a hunter, forget you. If you've ever killed an animal just for the stuff of it, forget you. The only thing you savages have the right to do is the right to remain silent while the police arrest you for murder. Yes, murder. In these modern times we live in, what some like to call the 21st century, we as a species have evolved past the need for senseless barbarism like the kind of bullstuff you starfishs pull when you get liquored up and go kill Bambi. You know what? Nature can take care of itself, it has for millions of years. It doesn't need us loving it up by hiding behind that bullstuff reason of "population control". Yeah, I got your loving population control right here. It's called kill the hunters. An eye for an eye. Capital punishment for capital murder. I consider the murder of animals to be on equal footing with the murder of humans. "Well Nightweaver, what about plants? They have feelings too baww baww baww. What about when you hit a deer/raccoon/squirrel with your car? What about stomping on insects?" You know what I'm loving talking about you pieces of stuff. Stop muddling the argument with your goddamn straw man bull. I don't need reams of scientific data to back up what I'm saying...KILLING IS WRONG NO MATTER WHAT IT IS.
Did you know that the vast majority of hunters in the U.S. are big fat neckbeards and rednecks, probably like the kind who post on this forum? It's true. Try going to India with that stupid "animals are lower than humans" stuff you speciesist friend, see how far you get before somebody runs your ass over. And don't try that bullstuff that "we need them for food, we need them for research, we need them for clothing, we need them for this, we need them for that..." It doesn't hold any loving water with me anymore, not that it ever really did. This is the same species which just mapped the human genome a few years ago; it's time for us to crawl out of the caveman macho bullstuff days and get with the program. Yes I think I can make things better by yelling at you, so shut up. Yes I'm a member of PETA, so shut up. If I was less lazy and actually owned one, I'd take my gun and go out and hunt the hunters. I'd kill every one of you arrogant speciesist bastards I could find. Same goes for you meat-eaters. Hey starfish, I've thrived for 15 years on no meat, now it's YOUR turn to try it out. Or are you too pusillanimous individual? Yeah that's what I thought, goddamn bunch of pussies who are too scared to go vegan. My conscience is clear, what about yours? Hm? You don't mind they're killed in horrible ways in slaughterhouses? You ENJOY watching them die? Then you're the worst kind of scum, lower even than child molesters. I spit on your fetid corpse.
Finally (because I know you people are having OH SO MUCH FUN copying this into your ED entry on me), I DROP THE BIG BOMB! I'm into love with animals! HOLY loving stuff WHAT THE forget. Guess what, it's kind of been skirted around in everything I've said about the topic anyway, but I support enormous animal snakees in my mouth. Yes that's right, let's go there. OH SISTER! I will admit I've never actually tried it on any animal, but I would love to. I can hear someone now "Wow what a loving hypocrite that he says he loves animals but wants to raep them lolololololoololol" Let me get one thing straight friend: Pleasuring an animal loveually and raping them are two different things, and if you don't know the difference then you shouldn't be trying it in the first place.
Do you think your dog likes getting loving blue balls because there's no pusillanimous individual for him? THAT'S ABUSE. THAT'S RAEP. Letting your poor pet suffer in silence because of a lack of loveual gratification. So OK, we got dogs covered, and it's different with all animals and some are NOT designed for us, so you better stay the forget away from them. But honestly, do you think that horse hates having his richard rubbed if he's standing there and thrusting his hips at you? Believe me pal, if that horse didn't want you there, you'd have a busted jaw or broken neck already from a hoof to the face. So those are the two most obvious examples of animals I would like to pleasure; it's amazing how fast everyone's going to misinterpret this post and read into this that I'm some SICK forget who you can't let near your children. That's amazing, those people should win a loving Nobel Prize for their stupidity.
I'm about as benign a guy as you'll ever find, but here's what I can't get over: I'm in this fandom, furry fandom see, and its artists draw a LOT of dog roosters and a LOT of horse roosters and I'm like W-T-F? We love to see art of this stuff but try soooo hard to deny to ourselves that it's just fantasy? forget you, slap yourself into reality. YOU'RE LOOKING AT DOG rooster AND GETTING OFF TO IT. Whether its drawn or not, you can't claim that you're not "into" animal love. People just LOVE to make fun of us, zoophiles, bestialists, friends, scum, whatever they call us. It's one big self-assuring joke apparently for humanity to delude itself into thinking that we're so much superior to lower animals that we cannot have love with them. Interspecies love is common in the wild, and yes I'm aware of the apparent hypocrisy between that and what I just said about hunting. "Animals hunt but we can't , but we can forget them? Derpa derpa derp." Well guess what? We've domesticated all these species, and we are responsible for them. We're responsible for their care. Sometimes these poor beasts can't get off the way they want to, because of the physical restrictions we place on them by separating the lovees and so forth. So we should be able to masturbate them at least if they're horny and have no other outlet! I'd sign up to do it; I'd be at the loving head of the line for that stuff. Giant horse richard in my mouth? DO WANT!
this is just a copypasta
