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ABS FIESTA REDUX
carolcat:
She nods, a little disappointed that all she got out of the gesture was a sigh. "Yeah." Her hand on his shoulder trails down his arm briefly before returning to her pockets.
Her flashlight gets pulled out and switched on, casting a circle of light on the ground. She starts to walk back to the base. "You aren't mad, are you?" She asks after a long period of silence. "About... this whole ordeal? I mean... really, you have every reason to be, but..." She trails off, glancing at him nervously.
CypherX:
"How can I be mad at the truth?" Gus asks rhetorically, quoting a philosophy principle he learned once. He doesn't elaborate for a moment, torn between explanation and silence.
"Cualli, I think you misunderstand me. I truly mean I won't get between anything because that's not what I want. I don't think less of you,-"
He rubs his gloved hands and takes a moment to gather his thoughts, sighing.
"I am 31 years old- nearly 32. I have been fighting this war for two years. I've seen enough for several lifetimes, let alone this one. I want nothing more than for this all to end, to head back home, start a family and live out the rest of my life in peace. I-,"
He goes quiet again to consider his position now. The cold north Aesthian air seems fitting, and he speaks again softly.
"Commitment is an unsure thing, our jobs considered. You are a remarkable person and I only want the best for you. But-," he turns to look into her eyes, "I'm not going between you and him."
Gus stands open and vulnerable in the near-empty airfield, feeling smaller than he ever had before. The cold never bothered him until now, and he shivers.
carolcat:
She listens to him, relieved that he at least isn't angry with her for letting him down like she did. The mention of wanting to start a family digs at her, though.
"I'm afraid I wouldn't be the best person to get committed to if a family is what you want," she says softly, sadness in her voice.
Commitment really is an unsure thing, she thinks to herself. I don't know how I'd react if Arkhip didn't come back after a mission, and now Gus. The sad expression on her face grows as she runs the thought through her head. She didn't want to lose anyone, but she feared that it was bound to happen eventually.
She buries part of her face in her coat collar again, muffling her chattering teeth. "For everyone's sake, I hope it's over soon."
CypherX:
"That's not what I meant," Gus says softly.
His reflections during his time down in Svirask come to mind. He rubs the large scar across his abdomen, remembering the fiery ejection from the plane.
"The sooner the better," he agrees quietly.
carolcat:
She blinks and looks quickly at him when she hears his words. "You don't want...?" Cualli's voice trails and, despite herself, she feels relieved. "Oh. Sorry, I just assume when people talk about starting a family, they mean..." She seems unwilling to finish the thought and watches Gus' hand.
"You look bothered by something," she comments, switching off her flashlight and putting it back into her pocket now that they're in the glow of the lights on the base. Her fingers are cold and stiff despite wearing gloves.