Freewheelin’: Lost Adam Sandler Film (Creepypasta)
Note: This story was submitted to me by a person who wishes to remain anonymous. I have no way of confirming the veracity of the events portrayed in this story, nor do I have any further knowledge of Adam Sandler’s alleged unreleased film Freewheelin’, aside from the information provided in this story.Ever since I was young, I have been a huge fan of comedian and actor, Adam Sandler. I guess you could say that I’m a Sandler-head. To be honest, how anyone could possibly dislike Adam Sandler. He’s funny, talented, and his films are excellent. I will admit that there are a few exceptions to that, but I can find some form of enjoyment even in his worst films. There is one Adam Sandler film that isn’t like the others, and just thinking about it make me sick. It’s called Freewheelin’ and I wish I could forget it… oh god, how I wish I could forget it.
Freewheelin had a troubled production history. It had gone through several directors, with at least three other actors proposed to be at the head of the film before its studio (which I won’t specify) settled on Adam Sandler. In a rare interview in which Sandler spoke about the film, he said that it had excited him. It was like no other film that he had starred in. He said it was macabre dark comedy with sharp, satirical humor. Though, at the time of this interview, the film would go through another major rewrite, as the head writer and director both left for reasons that remain obscure to this day.
The months after the film’s last writer and director left aren’t well documented. It was nearly impossible to find decent information on what happened during that time; but from I did manage to find, I learned that Sandler had become much more involved in the film’s directing and writing. He had a very specific vision for how he wanted the film to turn out. He wanted it to be a powerful, dark satire that mocked humanity’s most base desires. It was meant to be an inverse of all the films he had created and stared in beforehand, a film that twisted the very definition of comedy, his magnum opus.
During this time, Sandler started reading a lot of Sartre.
He became frustrated that the crew and his costars seemingly did not understand his vision. Sandler would regularly have violent outbursts during filming, and had even nearly choked one of his costars to death, an incident the studio quickly hid and settled out of court. Sandler soon found himself the sole writer, director, and actor on Freewheelin’ and he had fallen into a deep depression. That is where the information on Freewheelin’s production ends.
Freewheelin’s studio went bankrupt and was bought out by another larger studio near the end of its production. The film had never received a public release, and Sandler still refuses to acknowledge its existence. It was long thought to be lost, like a holy grail to any Sandler-head. That was until invitations to a viewing were given out to a select few dedicated Sandler-heads. I was one of those Sandler-heads… unfortunately.
The viewing was held at a downtrodden, warehouse-like theater in the middle of nowhere. I saw a few other Sandler-heads there too, but I didn’t get much time to speak to any of them, as ushers appeared to show us into the theater. To my surprise, we were all taken to separate isolated rooms to watch the film.
Freewheelin’ started out innocently enough. A shot of the Golden Gate Bridge was shown, similar to the beginning of Full House was shown. Text appeared on the screen that said “Full House”, another strange similarity to Full House, but I decided to let it go. I thought that it might have just been a coincidence. The entire Full House opening had played at then the movie truly began.
Adam Sandler was sitting half naked in what seemed to be an exact replica of the living room from Full House. He had a full beard and looked sickly, almost like a corpse. It was as if he hadn’t taken care of himself for months. He spoke something, but it was so faint that I wasn’t able to make it out. Then, he spoke again. “Me freewheelin’.”, he said in a voice so low and full of hate that it was like a demon’s growl. He walked up to the camera, putting his face directly in front of it. His eyes were bloodshot as if he had gotten no sleep. He spoke clearly and precisely in that same demonic voice, “Me freewheelin’.”
That’s when he began to sob. It was like he wasn’t acting. His sobs were so full of pain and his body convulsed in ways I didn’t think were possible. It was disgusting to look at, but it got worse. A man, who looked exactly like Bob Saget appeared out of thin air. He didn’t seem to notice Adam Sandler crying, and if he did, he didn’t seem to care. He was staring directly at me. I swear to god, it was like he knew that I was watching him. I’ll never forget that expression on his face. He was so calm, with a faint smile, but I knew it was a lie. I knew he was evil. I knew that this Bob Saget impersonator had done this to Adam. And I began to cry too. I was so helpless.
I couldn’t take the film anymore and I tried to leave the room, but the door was locked. I banged on the door to get help, but nobody came and I had left my cellphone in the car. Even if I had it, there was no service in the area anyway. I was stuck with Adam Sandler, I was stuck with Bob Saget, I was stuck with Freewheelin’, and there was nothing I could do. The rest of the film is like a blur to me. All I can remember are faint shots of Adam Sandler covered in his own feces, and that goddamn Bob Saget creature covered in blood, smiling as if there was nothing wrong. When it was over, I found myself in my car on a deserted roadside. I couldn’t find the theater again.
I can still hear it too, so clearly in my mind, Sandlers chant, “Me freewheelin’, me freewheelin’.”, and his sobs. At night I swear that I can still see Bob Saget covered in blood, just standing over me, smiling. I regret watching Freewheelin’ my life has been ruined. This is a warning to all Sandler-heads, or just curious movie lovers in general. If you ever get an offer to watch Freewheelin’, don’t take it. And if you find a copy, destroy it. Maybe that way, you can save yourself.
