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Billnye has turned to the darkside
Daswiruch:
so tactical let me ask you this:
if you had a friend whom you recently discovered was transgendered and they wanted to be referred to the direct opposite of what you've been calling them before like he => she or she => he would you do it or not do it on purpose?
PhantOS:
But that's exactly what it is- honorifics is about respect, esteem and authority. You address your mother as 'mom' or 'mother' or 'ma'am' out of respect and authority. She doesn't have special snowflake syndrome, it's just respectful and it makes her feel respected when you call her that.
Likewise, how you address people is important for impressions and showing them respect. if you want to selectively respect people's honorifics and selectively justify some compared to others, you're just being entirely inconsistent for the sake of your own opinion. At that point, it's no longer 'how can i show my respect for this person' but 'i dont like this person's opinion so i refuse to respect them'
Tactical Nuke:
--- Quote from: Daswiruch on April 30, 2017, 01:32:04 AM ---so tactical let me ask you this:
if you had a friend whom you recently discovered was transgendered and they wanted to be referred to the direct opposite of what you've been calling them before like he => she or she => he would you do it or not do it on purpose?
--- End quote ---
friends aren't random people who want you to get it right on your first go
if you're transgender I have no qualms with you whatsoever if you look the part
otherwise it's loving scary
sorry
--- Quote from: PhantOS on April 30, 2017, 01:35:32 AM ---But that's exactly what it is- honorifics is about respect, esteem and authority. You address your mother as 'mom' or 'mother' or 'ma'am' out of respect and authority. She doesn't have special snowflake syndrome, it's just respectful and it makes her feel respected when you call her that.
Likewise, how you address people is important for impressions and showing them respect. if you want to selectively respect people's honorifics and selectively justify some compared to others, you're just being entirely inconsistent for the sake of your own opinion. At that point, it's no longer 'how can i show my respect for this person' but 'i dont like this person's opinion so i refuse to respect them'
--- End quote ---
you're not getting the point of the post (funnily enough the post was in response to you)
the honorifics part being about authority - yes
but we're talking about pronouns; pronoun usage is subconscious, it's not about respect
once you need to be referred to as something out of the ordinary (like "xe" or "xir" or "gogogogogogogogoir") it becomes about authority because anyone who is referred to as something different than their actual name has some sort of power over you, figuratively or literally
if you, a random stranger, are going to expect of me the first time we meet that I know your unique pronouns then don't expect for me to ever take you seriously
if you're my friend then you're cool unless you go into the "xe" or "xir" territory in which case we're probably going to clash
too bad none of my friends are like that though
Daswiruch:
i have no idea how that's supposed to answer my question
PhantOS:
--- Quote from: Tactical Nuke on April 30, 2017, 01:36:29 AM ---friends aren't random people who want you to get it right on you first go
--- End quote ---
there are hardly any gender-different people that will instantly shame you for getting their pronouns wrong. if they do exist, they exist at some antifa protest on the other side of the country and make up a very small minority
if someone kindly corrects you and says "hey i prefer to be addressed as ze/zis/zer" in a very respectful manner to you with no hate or anguish, it'd be respectful to try your best to abide by it. that doesn't mean that if you get it wrong again you should be lynched, but at least show that you take some effort to remember what they said. that shows that you have respect
otherwise just dont bother