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Did you ever deal with long distance relationships?

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PhantOS:


--- Quote from: Insert Name Here² on August 21, 2017, 01:22:24 PM ---"Facts"

Opinions =/= Facts bru

--- End quote ---
the fact that text-based relationships aren't real fruitful relationships is well known, just like friends with benefits, or sugar daddies. its just liking someone for one of the key needs of a relationship, but not all


--- Quote from: IkeTheGeneric on August 21, 2017, 01:23:02 PM ---Dude, we're not talking about internet relationships, we're talking about long distance relationships aka personal relationships that go long distance for any period of time. That's sorta what I loving hinted at with the quote you glossed over completely

LDRs aren't supposed to last forever, that's kind of the point, staking it out long distance until they can be personal, healthy relationships again. Your bullstuff about it "not working" doesn't help anyone

--- End quote ---
then maybe i misunderstood the definition, if thats the case then im sorry

IkeTheGeneric:


--- Quote from: PhantOS on August 21, 2017, 01:24:33 PM ---then maybe i misunderstood the definition, if thats the case then im sorry

--- End quote ---

duuuuude lol sorry but thats like a huge part of the miscommunication here

internet relationships don't work, but ldr implies that the relationship became long distance with the idea that it will become personal, not something that stays long distance forever

The reason my long distance relationship didn't work out is just because me and my bf just didn't have the time or the money to get back together and decided to end it on good terms

PhantOS:

ldrs with someone you personally have known at some point is definitely better, but the fact remains that eventually the core needs of a relationship have to be met. that part is probably understood by now.

i guess what i'm trying to say is that continuing an ldr with the intent of never being able to commit or return (say you're moving and your partner can't come with ever) is essentially the end of the relationship and just beating a dead horse. for some people, its easier to say goodbye than to try to ldr.

Headcrab Zombie:


--- Quote from: PhantOS on August 21, 2017, 01:27:49 PM ---i guess what i'm trying to say is that continuing an ldr with the intent of never being able to commit or return (say you're moving and your partner can't come with ever) is essentially the end of the relationship and just beating a dead horse. if by some miracle you manage to return, then sure it continues

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If you were in that situation and decided that ending the relationship would be the best, then that would be your choice, and no one is saying you shouldn't do so.

But you can't tell someone else "oh guess it's time for you to end your relationship now" because not everyone has the same needs or is looking for the same thing as you.

PhantOS:

as i said before, having only one need out of a relationship doesn't make it a relationship. the relationship ends the moment you leave permanently and enter that ldr phase. at that point, its not a healthy relationship as a psychologist would define it as. its just limbo between friendship and intimate emotions, and it will gradually descend into friendship and later into acquaintances. some people like that more than others, and there's no problem with that, but its not a relationship

just like you cant consider friends with benefits as a relationship, you can't consider permanent ldr a relationship. it just lacks the needs that a healthy relationship requires to be sustainable

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