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| Mass Shooting Megathread | Rancho Tehama, CA | 5 dead, shooter down |
| << < (49/54) > >> |
| Rally:
< Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended < Four ruffians break into my house < "What the devil?" as I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle < Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot < Draw my pistol on the second man, misses him entirely because it's smooth-bore and nails the neighbors dog < I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot < "Tally ho, lads!" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms < Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion < Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch < Just as the founding fathers intended |
| Red Spy:
that is exactly how i live |
| PhantOS:
< Own a minigun for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended < Four communists break into my house < "Whatn ternation?" as I grab my m1 helmet and Anti tank battery < Blow 50 golf ball sized holes through the first man, he's dead on the spot < Draw my fully automatic assault rifle on the second man, hits him entirely because it's rifled, and nails the neighbors < I have to resort to the artillery gun mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with napalm < "I like cheeseburgers!" the napalm burns down the entire neighborhood, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms < fix scope and calculate the wind trajectory that will direct my 308 towards the last terrified rapscallion < Enters and exits his chest, hits the engine block on the neighbor's car, igniting the gas and killing a family of 5 < Just as the founding fathers intended |
| Red Spy:
that's also exactly how i live |
| Rally:
Should've kept the bayonet part but replaced it with a chainsaw bayonet instead |
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