i wanted to shout at this stuffty franchise for years, so here i am.
Let me start off by saying that i personally like anything that nintendo makes or is involved with, especially kirby. Ive even played a lot of kirbys dream land 2. Speaking of which, that game got a players choice award
Nintendo has had no shortage of their own IPs for different types of gamers. most of them i really like, or appreciate from a neutral perspective.
However, in 1995, a huge stuffstorm occured. An evil man known as satoshi tajiri, wanted to create the ultimate cashcow franchise that tried to pander to kids.
He pitched the idea to nintendo of japan to localize it worldwide, and some handicapped forget at the meeting said HURDEEDUR DIS IS A GRATE IDEUH WE SHOULD TOTALLY GREENLIT DIS stuff FOR THE REST OF DA WOURLD TA SEE, AND SPEND 20 YEURS PLUHS NOT JANCHING A SINGUHL DING WIT EVERY INSTARUMENT!
then nintendo of america decided to give the idea a new name, little did they know that the half of the name they picked was being used by another franchise about a blue robot cat who helps a little boy
cough cough doraemon cough coughand so in 1996, we got the 2 pieces of stuff that launched a thousand stuffs, known as.......
The first 2 games in the series, red and blue
Where the
forgetDo i
lovingBegin
The concept of the game is loving bullstuff.
The main key feature of this game, revolves around these FUGLY creatures known as Pokemon, that you need to catch with these things called Pokeballs, and use them as a buddy to fight other ones.
Speaking of which, theres this stupid loving section at the beginning of the game where a guy named Professor Oak
Lets you choose one as a starter. The problem is, is that theyre completely randomized every time you start a new file, and most of the time, theyre stuffty ones.
Why would you do that to a kid? The designers here were loving starfishs!
But then, it gets even worse.
In 1997, the game got an anime series, which mind you, is loving WORSE THAN ATROCIOUS. It was literally exactly how not to make an anime for kids. The characters are annoying, the voices are even more ear piercing than bubsys voice in bubsy 3d, the animation is eye bleedingly ugly, and the plot of every episode has so many asspulls out of the loving ass.
Mind you, this was 1997, more than THIRTY loving YEARS after many other animes for kids, such as Doraemon, which were miles better.
Because of that, you'd think these people would get a goddamn clue on how to make a decent or good anime for kids, without it being a complete clusterforget, but no. They made a piece of stuffe and got away with getting praise for it. So you know what?
forget THIS FRANCHISE.as a matter of fact, COME THE forget OVER HERE PIKACHU! IM GONNA SHOVE YOUR TAIL IN MY BLENDER YOU loving ELECTRIC roosterSUCKER!
P.s, thank trey parker and matt stone for creating the south park episode Chinpokomon.
