my guy mr.millard is already a ex .u.s army major
Not enough detail, chump.
Dealer.... is alive?
Oh, and I made some minor revisions to my character's bio, mis-statements, a little bit of extra stuff. But honestly, Louis isn't a criminal on the run and it will be literally impossible to reach the level of detail your example bio has without boring you to death. I'm afraid this is about the best a 12-year-old can do with this kind of character.
Thats actually Runner. It was done deliberately. The army don't know a lot of stuff.
Crap, the nickname "Hunter" is already taken? Can I still use it in my bio?
"Hunter" is the name of the UAV (Un-manned Aerial Vehicle) scanning the city. Its not really a character but you can see it sometimes if you keep your eyes open.
But I think "Hunter" is taken. Its pretty common.