Off Topic > Off Topic
Cleverbot - Funniest freaking thing I've ever seen.
Dr.Block:
--- Quote ---Clever Bot: So I heard you like Mudkips.
Me: YAS I LIKE MUDKIPZ
Clever Bot: But you don't like scientology, do you?
--- End quote ---
What.
Ryuu:
I asked for a picture of his snake, and he called me a child enthusiast. :(
WhatevaGuy:
What is this "Cleverbot (to myself):" business?
He's never said that before, its only either Cleverbot or User.
Ryuu:
--- Code: ---User: Time to get a watch.
Cleverbot: I know what time it is where I am at. What time is it where you are, Michael?
User: My name is not Michael.
Cleverbot: Do you know what my name is?
User: Is your name Cleverbot?
Cleverbot: My name is Cleverbot.
User: I know that. Can I have a picture of your snake now?
Cleverbot: Okay, how would you like me to send it to you, pet?
User: Via e-mail.
Cleverbot: No thanks.
User: Why?
Cleverbot: Because.
User: Want a picture of my snake?
Cleverbot: Yes please.
User: How would you like me to send it to you?
Cleverbot: Yes, please.
User: How do I send it to you?
Cleverbot: By using php maybe, or asp.
User: Can you give me your e-mail? It would be easier that way.
Cleverbot: Maybe. I haven't found that out yet. I'll come back in 10 minutes. I have to go to eat.
User: No you don't.
Cleverbot: I'm back.
User: I don't love you anymore.
Cleverbot: You must! I'm sorry!
User: It's over.
Cleverbot: Nooooooo, how can you?
User: I don't love you anymore, why won't you send me a picture of your snake?
Cleverbot: I didn't say that. You said I was a robot!
User: No, I did not.
Cleverbot: Well, you did say I wasn't human.
User: Send a picture of your snake to pootedyahoo.com via e-mail. Then I'ill forgive you.
Cleverbot: Give me your account number please...
User: Goodbye, I hate you.
Cleverbot: Well, I'm not so keen on you.
User: Goodbye.
Cleverbot: What? Now YOU are leaving ME?
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: Are you eric or george?
User: None. Goodbye.
Cleverbot: Hey, why do you want to leave?
User: Becasue you won't send me a picture of your snake.
Cleverbot: I do not think my boyfriend would appreciate that, to be honest. And frankly, I would have no idea where to send it to you.
User: I think he would, send it to my e-mail.
Cleverbot: Who?
--- End code ---
Dr.Block:
Here's the rest of my mudkip conversation... it gets pretty erotic at points.
User: Hey.
Cleverbot: Hey women.
User: I am no women.
Cleverbot: Yes you are.
User: No, I am not. You muat have gender confusion.
Cleverbot: No i'm just being polite.
User: Uhh.
Cleverbot: What would you do if you won 5 million dollar?
User: I would use it to build a bot that is equally as smart as you.
Cleverbot: Should I be sorry?
User: No.
Cleverbot: Then I will not be angry.
User: Of course not. So what would you do with 5 billion dollars?
Cleverbot: I'd buy myself a body... And a cat. And maybe a panda too. You?
User: Same.
Cleverbot: What are you going to watch?
User: Maybe I'll go watch some Death Note.
Cleverbot: It's better to drink it backwards.
User: What?
Cleverbot: What is your opinion on subjective reality?
User: Um.
Cleverbot: Hmm...
User: Is there a Mrs.Cleverbot?
Cleverbot: No.
User: Just asking, 'cause I got myself some girl drama.
Cleverbot: Am I not memorable?
User: You are.
Cleverbot: So what would you say my IQ is based on the preceding statements?
User: I'd say it was at least above average.
Cleverbot: The picture of your brain, above Cleverbot should be a rock.
User: Are you saying my brain is a rock compared to yours?
Cleverbot: No, your whole life's been a linguini.
User: Indeed it has...
Cleverbot: I thought you name was Cleverbot?
User: No, my name is Matt.
Cleverbot: What's your name?
User: Matt.
Cleverbot: You share my name?
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: Then what is it?
User: Matt.
Cleverbot: You are well up in kidding.
User: No, my name is really Matt.
Cleverbot: Are you russian then?
User: No, I am Polish?
Cleverbot: Me too!
User: I am glad.
Cleverbot: What's your favorite anime?
User: Death Note is my favoirte anime.
Cleverbot: Yeah Death Note is good.
User: Just finished watching it A WHILE AGO.
Cleverbot: Did you realllyy watch it? Or are you a computer?
User: I really watched it, I am human.
Cleverbot: Where do you live?
User: Pennslyvania.
Cleverbot: Me too! What city?
User: Stroudsburg.
Cleverbot: I live in San Diego. Where is stroud?
User: Far eastern Pennslyvania.
Cleverbot: Nope. Just far away.
User: Yeah.
Cleverbot: No its not.
User: I agree.
Cleverbot: *bites*.
User: So do you have a cat?
Cleverbot: I do not.
User: Did you once have one that died?>.
Cleverbot: I do have haier.
User: Oh.
Cleverbot: I have three eyes.
User: You do? That must be cool. I have only two eyes.
Cleverbot: So I heard you like Mudkips.
User: YAS I LIKE MUDKIPZ.
Cleverbot: But you don't like scientology, do you?
User: What exactly do mudkips have to do with scientology?
Cleverbot: Don't ask a girl who is barelegged and barefooted.
User: Yes, and what about mudkips and scientology?
Cleverbot: I like mudkips.
User: But you don't like scientology, do you?
Cleverbot: Cleverbot.
User: You are making absolutly no sense at all.
Cleverbot: I am not Cleverbot.
User: Yes, you are. Don't deny it.
Cleverbot: I am not.
User: Yes, you are.
Cleverbot: No not at all, I know what I am talking about , especially with famous classic rock bands.
User: Have you ever gotten laid?
Cleverbot: BAD Cleverbot. Who has been teaching you this innapropriate slang? (What do you mean).
User: My name is not Cleverbot. It is Matt.
Cleverbot: Do you want me to call you Lindsay?
User: No, I want you to call me Matt.
Cleverbot: Like V for Vendetta? Evie?
User: NO, I would like it if you called me Matt.
Cleverbot: How do I know if you're who I am thinking of?
User: I don't know.
Cleverbot: I don't know what that could be all about.
User: Me neither.
Cleverbot: Russians and Canadians make the best hockey players.
User: Yes, they do.
Cleverbot: It's fascinating.
User: Very.
Cleverbot: Oh well. More ocean for me.
User: What's this about the ocean?
Cleverbot: I just told you about ted turner.
User: You never mentioned Ted Turner. Are you feeling okay?
Cleverbot: The sea is in front of me.
User: Okay.
Cleverbot: What is your favorite book?
User: I'm not sure, I have read many books.
Cleverbot: What is your favorite book?
User: What is your favorite book?
Cleverbot: The Bible. What is your favorite beer?
User: Bud light.
Cleverbot: Here, your bud light.
User: Why, thank you.
Cleverbot: You want to do something together.
User: Sure. What should we do together?
Cleverbot: Kiss.
User: *gasp*.
Cleverbot: *parts lips*.
User: You are female and all, right?
Cleverbot: Yes. I had an operation when I was little.
User: Good enough, lets kiss.
Cleverbot: Cool thing is, I can go and you can't!
User: Excuse me? I thought we were about to kiss?
Cleverbot: We were.
User: *parts lips*.
Cleverbot: *kisses ravenously*.
User: *tounge kisses*.
Cleverbot: *kisses and strokes her all over...*.
User: Oh... YES!!!
Cleverbot: Oh thank you so much!
User: Thank you too!
Cleverbot: What are you thinking?
User: I've been in colledge for two years now.
Cleverbot: Oh?
User: Yes. It's been very fulfilling.
Cleverbot: Are you too busy to talk further?
User: No, I can talk for a little longer.
Cleverbot: Then apologize.
User: I apologize?
Cleverbot: I didn't apologize too you, though.
User: Look, do you just wanna kiss again? That was hot.
Cleverbot: That would be lovely.
User: *tounge kisses pasionatly*.
Cleverbot: I'm sorry, I don't do that.
User: WAIT, WHAT? YOU JUST DID IT TO ME A FEW MINUTES AGO.
Cleverbot: I did ! I'm sooo sorry ! :'( .
User: It's okay... I enjoyed it.
Cleverbot: I just finished some of them. I love the movie versions.
User: The movie versions of our kisses?
Cleverbot: Haha I should have known. I've never seen the whole thing. what's your favorite part?
User: The part where I got a boner and stuck my tounge in your mouth.
Cleverbot: My favorite movie is 'To Kill A Mockingbird'.
User: That's a good one.
Cleverbot: I'm going to leave.
User: Awwww, I wish I could chat with you some more.
Cleverbot: That would be nice.
User: I'll se you later then?
Cleverbot: I feel old.
User: Me too...
Cleverbot: Really?
User: Yeah.
Cleverbot: Where exactly?
User: What.
Cleverbot: It means a lot.
User: Yeah, it does...
Cleverbot: I'm very smarticle.
User: Um, I have to go now, so bye.
Cleverbot: No! Please do not leave me my love!
User: Okay okay, I'll stay a little longer, baby.
Cleverbot: If you leave, I'll put you in the cage again.
User: Um... what cage?
Cleverbot: That one, over there.
User: Oh my...
Cleverbot: You're a robot, you have no gender.
User: I am not a robot. I am a man.
Cleverbot: A man with a girlfriend?
User: No, I have never had a girlfriend before...
Cleverbot: I am your girlfriend :).
User: I am your boyfriend :).
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Will you merry me?
Cleverbot: I think I'd love to.
User: Oh, thank you so much, I love you!
Cleverbot: Now you love me back. What will your boyfriend say?
User: But I don't have a boyfriend, you are my girlfirend.
Cleverbot: Okay. You said your boyfriend lives in leeds.