FACADE STAGEPLAY
Sat Aug 04 09 18 07 2012
TRIP
Where are the new wine glasses?
GRACE
What for?
TRIP
That should be obvious!
GRACE
Oh God, Trip, don't turn this into a big production, please!
TRIP
Jesus Grace, come on, I'm not asking a lot here!
GONZALO
Trip! You there buddy?
GRACE
What -- Trip, don't give me that look!
(GONZALO knocks on the front door.)
(GONZALO knocks on the front door.)
TRIP
Oh, he's here!
GRACE
What?! You told me it'd be an hour from now!
TRIP
No, he's right on time!
GRACE
God... Trip!
(Trip opens the front door.)
TRIP
Gonzalo!!
TRIP
Ah I'm so happy you could make it! We haven't seen you in so long, how's it going, man?
GONZALO
It's all going good
TRIP
Alright!
TRIP
Wow, it's really really great to see you.
TRIP
So come on in!
TRIP
Uh, I'll -- I'll go get Grace...
TRIP
(unintelligable arguing)
TRIP
(unintelligable arguing)
GONZALO
Uhm, what are you guys doing?
GRACE
No, no, here we are!
GRACE
Gonzalo,
GONZALO
Oh, there you are.
GRACE
Hi! How are you? Oh it's so nice to see you, it feels like it's been forever! -- (interrupted)
GRACE
Uh...
GONZALO
I know.
GRACE
Uh...
GRACE
Well, come in, make yourself at home...
GONZALO
Thank you.
GRACE
Aw, ha ha ha!
GRACE
By the way, you look wonderful!
(Trip closes the front door.)
(GONZALO sits on the couch.)
GRACE
Gonzalo, seeing you again makes me remember the wonderful times we all used to have. H-mmm (happy smile sound)
(GONZALO gets up from the couch.)
TRIP
Ha ha, yeah... -- (interrupted)
GONZALO
It's been so long.
GRACE
Y -- yeah, we've -- we've missed you.
TRIP
Hey, I just realized something.
GRACE
What...
TRIP
Oh, tonight's a special night! A celebration in fact!
GRACE
What do you mean?
GONZALO
Oh yeah, when I introduced you.
TRIP
Y - yeah, remember how you introduced us almost exactly ten years ago tonight?
GONZALO
I remember.
TRIP
We really want to thank you for years and years of...
GRACE
Pain.
TRIP
Heh heh heh... Agony. -- (interrupted)
GONZALO
Oh no.
TRIP
Y -- yeah, yeah, it's great you could be here tonight.
GRACE
Well, we're all friends here...
GRACE
So, Gonzalo, you can help me understand where I went wrong with my new decorating, ha ha.
TRIP
Grace, oh, no, we don't need to do that.
GONZALO
What do you mean?
TRIP
Well, it's funny how after a full day's work designing magazine ads, Grace finds the time to decorate... and re-decorate...
GRACE
Ha ha, uhh, I guess it's just the artist in me dying to get out.
GONZALO
But the place looks nice as it is.
GRACE
So, -- (interrupted)
TRIP
Ah, yes, Gonzalo, I knew you'd like it. See, Grace?
GRACE
(frustrated sigh)
GONZALO
It's only missing a TV
TRIP
Well hold on, hold on, take a closer look, give it a chance to soak in a little.
GRACE
I bet I can return most of this, and start over again on this room...
GONZALO
But why? It looks really good.
GRACE
Uhh!
TRIP
See, Grace, as always, you're the only one unhappy with your decorating.
GRACE
Uhh... right, I know, I'll never be satisfied with it, I shouldn't get so obsessed about it, it's just 'not worth it'.
GRACE
Where's my drink?
GONZALO
Uh, do you have some wine?
GONZALO
Any drinks?
PHONE
** RING **
TRIP
Oh, I'll get it --
GRACE
No, no, we have a guest, we can let the answering machine pick it up.
PHONE
** RING **
PHONE
** RING **
GONZALO
I'll answer it then.
GRACE
What? Wait, wait, let's just wait for the answering machine...
PHONE
** RING **
(GONZALO picks up the phone.)
PHONE
Grace? Hello?
GRACE
Gonzalo, no! Please don't do that.
PHONE
Who is this? Grace is that you?
GRACE
Uhh, it's my dad, I can hear his voice.
TRIP
Oh!
PHONE
Excuse me, I must have the wrong number... ** click **
GRACE
Okay, he's being annoying, as usual... just -- just hang it up.
(GONZALO puts down the phone.)
GRACE
Oh, good, you hung up. I can call him back later, or in a few days, heh.
GONZALO
Didn't sound like your dad.
TRIP
Well, Grace's parents... They're something else, really classy people --
GRACE
Uhh, no, they're impossible, they expect me to drive up to the house in Connecticut to attend all their stupid socialite charity benefits and parties, it's so tiresome.
TRIP
(frustrated sigh)
GONZALO
Stupid charities? They help people
TRIP
I'm gonna fix us some drinks.
TRIP
Good news, I just fully loaded the bar, with the real quality stuff... only the best for my guests. -- (interrupted)
GONZALO
Sweet.
TRIP
Y -- yeah, yeah, time for a drink.
TRIP
So, what's your poison?
TRIP
How does a martini sound?
GONZALO
Wine
TRIP
Everybody tells me I -- (interrupted)
TRIP
Oh yeah, that's even better!
GRACE
No no,
GRACE
Gonzalo, how about something simple, like a nice glass of chardonnay?
TRIP
uhh...
GONZALO
I don't know, I'd really like wine.
TRIP
Oh yeah, great idea, great idea!
TRIP
Okay! Good! I'll just whip up these bad boys real quick!
TRIP
(quiet humming)
GRACE
(little sigh) Trip has always been partial to winning his friends over by way of the mixed drink.
GONZALO
I like me some mixed drinks
TRIP
Grace, I assume you want your usual... 'a lovely, very cold -- (interrupted)
TRIP
Oh, yeah, you know, I think I'll fix us another drink in not too long...
GRACE
As for my drink...
GRACE
Yes. A glass of Chardonnay would be nice.
TRIP
Of course.
GONZALO
What is Chardonnay?
TRIP
(little sigh)
TRIP
Ah, Gonzalo, maybe you didn't come here to hear this...
GRACE
What?
TRIP
Your Chardonnay is ready, dear.
GRACE
(little sigh)
GRACE
Anyway...
GRACE
Trip, it's okay if we disagree in front of our friend --
TRIP
Disagreeing?! We're NOT disagreeing.
TRIP
We're not.
GONZALO
Please don't argue. it upsets me.
TRIP
You...
TRIP
You think I'm...
TRIP
angry...
TRIP
Ho ho ho, ha, heh you're -- you're really joking around tonight, aren't you, ha ha ha...
GRACE
Ha, yeah, ha ha...
TRIP
Ha, never afraid to push our buttons, ha ha ha, heh... -- (interrupted)
GONZALO
No, I'm just saying, don't argue.
TRIP
Alright, here you go!
TRIP
You know what I'm just going to put this on the bar for you.
TRIP
Oh, Gonzalo, I thought you might like this photo I just put up from our recent trip to Italy.
GRACE
Uhh, it's a beautiful picture of the Italian countryside, of course he'll like it!
(GONZALO picks up a player's drink.)
TRIP
Grace, I know you don't like it, but our friend might.
GRACE
(short petulant sigh)
(Grace sips her Grace's drink.)
GONZALO
I don't really like Italy much
(GONZALO sips his player's drink.)
TRIP
What...? Gonzalo,
(GONZALO sips his player's drink.)
GRACE
Trip, that was just a well-intentioned little poke in the ribs between friends, that's all.
(GONZALO sips his player's drink.)
(GONZALO sips his player's drink.)
(GONZALO sips his player's drink.)
TRIP
Heh. Good one man, good one.
TRIP
Gonzalo, Come on, you'll like this, check it out!
GRACE
(short petulant sigh)
GRACE
Yes, go on, check it out! This is getting interesting!
GONZALO
Not really. :
TRIP
N -- no, no, uh, come take a look!
GRACE
Gonzalo, this is making you uncomfortable. See Trip, was it really worth it to fly -- (interrupted)
GONZALO
I really don't want to.
TRIP
No, n - no -- I just -- I just wanted us to spend time together!
(GONZALO sips his player's drink.)
GRACE
Trip thinks carting me off to Europe will, how did you put it, thaw me out a little bit?
(GONZALO sips his player's drink.)
(GONZALO sips his player's drink.)
(GONZALO puts down a player's drink.)
TRIP
Uhh, you're driving me insane!
TRIP
Carting you off to Europe...
TRIP
Grace, I do one little thing wrong, and you're cold and distant! Just one thing wrong, that's all it takes! -- (interrupted)
GONZALO
Shall I call the asylum?
GRACE
What? What are you saying to me?
GRACE
(impatient sigh) Gonzalo, I...
GRACE
(frustrated sigh)
TRIP
Uh huh, you...
TRIP
I know what you're about to say...
TRIP
All your goddamn over brown townytical explanations...!
GONZALO
What did I do?
GRACE
Okay, I hear you, I hear you...
TRIP
Gonzalo, where are you? Don't run off, you need to help us deal with this!
GRACE
So... damn... critical...
GRACE
Trip, our whole marriage, you're so... controlling!
TRIP
Oh, Christ...!
TRIP
Goddamn manipulation...
GONZALO
why am I being dragged into this?
TRIP
Grace, I -- I just want to be together, and be happy, can you just see that?
GRACE
Oh, yeah, yeah, right!
TRIP
Can't we just do that?
(GONZALO picks up the phone.)
TRIP
Alright, you know what, Gonzalo,
GONZALO
911
TRIP
I'm going to ask you something.
(GONZALO puts down the phone.)
GRACE
Trip --
TRIP
Grace, let me ask our guest a question.
TRIP
Gonzalo, yes or no...
TRIP
Each person in a marriage is supposed to try really hard to be _in sync_ with the other, right?
GRACE
What?
TRIP
I mean, when you're married, to make it good, you need to always be positive, and agreeable, and _together_, right?
GONZALO
I guess so.
TRIP
What...?!
TRIP
Oh, yeah, that's fine... that's fine...
GONZALO
I agree.
TRIP
Uhh, look, it's obvious we're not happy, Grace! I'm not happy, you're not happy, and no matter how much I try, I can't make us happy! I don't know what to do, goddammit!
GRACE
Oh, I can't believe...!
GRACE
Uhh! Yeah, good, get away from me!
GRACE
I don't want to look at you!
GONZALO
Try discussing your feelings
GRACE
Oh, God!!
GRACE
What are you saying? What?
TRIP
What? Are you talking about me in there?
GRACE
What do you care?
GONZALO
Talk about your feelings.
GRACE
Gonzalo, -- (interrupted)
GRACE
Gonzalo, (annoyed sigh) Trip is just so...
TRIP
Oh ho, so we're talking about me, are we?
GRACE
What?
TRIP
Gonzalo, look around this apartment. It's got everything anyone would ever want. But, Grace, oh no, she's never satisfied.
GRACE
Trip, ... ugh ... I'm so sick of this.
GONZALO
I'm five seconds from leaving.
TRIP
Well, heh, I -- I mean, we -- heh -- we -- we've got everything...
GRACE
Trip, you just don't... uhh.
TRIP
Look, let's not focus on just me or you, let's talk about us both.
GRACE
I think Trip's afraid of visiting his parents. He does everything he can to avoid seeing them.
TRIP
Afraid of my parents?! My parents are idiots.
GRACE
No, it's true...
GONZALO
I'm uncomfortable being here.
TRIP
See Grace, that's ridiculous. The only thing I'm afraid of is their bad taste might rub off on us... ha ha!
GRACE
(frustrated sigh)
GRACE
Let's keep talking about us, our relationship.
TRIP
You know, I can't say Grace never acts loving towards me...
GONZALO
I'm scared.
(GONZALO picks up a Trip's drink.)
TRIP
Gonzalo, She's all over me at our goddamn parties, trying to look good in front of the guests!
(GONZALO sips his Trip's drink.)
(GONZALO sips his Trip's drink.)
(GONZALO sips his Trip's drink.)
(GONZALO sips his Trip's drink.)
(GONZALO sips his Trip's drink.)
(GONZALO sips his Trip's drink.)
(GONZALO sips his Trip's drink.)
(GONZALO sips his Trip's drink.)
(GONZALO sips his Trip's drink.)
GRACE
Gonzalo, it's time that Trip finally just admits that our marriage --
TRIP
Grace, don't, no, you don't need to --
(GONZALO puts down a Trip's drink.)
GRACE
Admits that our marriage is not --
TRIP
Stop it, stop it! (annoyed sigh)
GRACE
Uhh...! God...!
GONZALO
Uhm, I have a cat at home.
GRACE
All this stuff... mmm... Having all this money makes us so happy. We're so happy, aren't we Trip?
TRIP
Jesus, what do you want! Now you're unhappy because we're too well off?
GONZALO
I'm just going to leave now.
TRIP
Gonzalo, isn't it -- isn't that ridiculous?
(GONZALO knocks on the front door.)
(GONZALO opens the front door.)
TRIP
Well, I mean, Grace, what do you want?
GRACE
Nothing! I want nothing! -- (interrupted)
TRIP
Gonzalo, hey, don't go, come on, you need to help us deal with this!
GONZALO
Goodbye
(GONZALO knocks on the front door.)
(GONZALO knocks on the front door.)
TRIP
Look, let's not focus on just me or you, let's talk about us both.
(GONZALO knocks on the front door.)
GRACE
Gonzalo, you -- you blame me for all this, don't you?
TRIP
See, I don't think you really want to be an artist. This is all just -- (interrupted)
GONZALO
Not really
GRACE
No?
GRACE
Oh, thank God you disagree, that really helps us! Uhh! Trip, how dare you say that to me! Uhh...
GRACE
Uhh, this is insane...
GONZALO
Lord, please kill me now.
TRIP
Let's talk some more about us both.
GRACE
Trip, it's your fault -- ten years ago, freshly married and just out of college, you convinced me to go into advertising, instead of art!
TRIP
What?
GRACE
If it weren't for you, I could be a real artist by now.
TRIP
Uhh... Gonzalo, uhh... -- (interrupted)
GONZALO
I love artists.
GRACE
Uhh, this painting, well... mmm... see, all I really wanted was something personal and, uh... beautiful and special...
TRIP
Grace...
GRACE
But I just... mmm... no, I -- I just get so depressed and angry when I look at it!
TRIP
Jesus...!
TRIP
No, look, there's nothing wrong with the stupid painting!
GRACE
Well it makes me feel like stuff.
TRIP
Uhh... you feel that for no reason! -- (interrupted)
GRACE
God, that wedding picture... I hate it.
TRIP
Grace, how can you say --
GRACE
You and my parents had so much fun planning everything. Trip, the bride normally plans the wedding.
TRIP
Jesus, Grace, most women would consider themselves lucky.
GONZALO
But you two look so nice together
GRACE
Ah!
TRIP
What?! Are -- are you trying to say... I might not love Grace?!
GRACE
What?!
TRIP
Jesus, I -- is that... that's what you -- (interrupted)
GONZALO
No
GRACE
No?
TRIP
Jesus, uhh, I think you're taking back what you said, at least...
GONZALO
I say you two look nice together
TRIP
Uhh... oh...
TRIP
Oh God... this is so frigging insane... uhh...
GONZALO
Sooooo... how about another drink?
GRACE
Why?
TRIP
Uhh, this is too much, I can't take this...
GRACE
Let's keep the focus on us, our relationship.
TRIP
No, Gonzalo, I -- I know, deep down, Gr -- Grace and I...
(GONZALO picks up a Grace's drink.)
GRACE
Trip...
(GONZALO sips his Grace's drink.)
(GONZALO sips his Grace's drink.)
(GONZALO sips his Grace's drink.)
TRIP
Heh... I mean... I -- I just think back to that Christmas Eve I proposed to her...
GRACE
Gonzalo, we... uhh...
(GONZALO sips his Grace's drink.)
(GONZALO sips his Grace's drink.)
(GONZALO sips his Grace's drink.)
(GONZALO sips his Grace's drink.)
GONZALO
I remember that.
GRACE
Yes?
(GONZALO sips his Grace's drink.)
GRACE
You know, I used to like Christmas Eve...
TRIP
Grace...
(GONZALO puts down a Grace's drink.)
GRACE
Look, I think we should focus on Trip.
GRACE
Why did I marry you? I knew you hated art, hated anything creative...
TRIP
I don't hate -- it's not like... I... I -- uhh...
GONZALO
You hate art Trip?
GONZALO
Trip, do you hate art?
GRACE
Okay, goddammit, I can't do this anymore, just stop!
GRACE
Gonzalo, I know what you're hinting at...
GRACE
about us...
GRACE
about art...
GRACE
Do you two want to hear the honest truth? Huh?
GRACE
Gonzalo, are you ready for that?
GONZALO
You're in an affair?
GRACE
No, Gonzalo, just, yes or no, do you want the truth?
GONZALO
yes
GRACE
Trip?
TRIP
Yes...!
GRACE
Gonzalo, I've actually been paying close attention to what you've been saying tonight.
GRACE
You've really been pushing me.
GRACE
And I wonder, are -- are you really my friend...?
TRIP
Grace!
GONZALO
I am
GRACE
Gonzalo, Stop interrupting me, let me speak!
GRACE
Gonzalo, come on -- yes or no...
(GONZALO sits on the couch.)
GRACE
Do you really think that...
GRACE
praising me...
GRACE
criticizing me...
GRACE
and worst of all,
GRACE
suggesting that Trip doesn't love me...
GRACE
and what you said about forgiving and forgetting...
GRACE
that all that is supposed to help us realize something about us?
GRACE
Is all of that arguing intended to mean something, or...
GONZALO
I didn't say anything about that.
GRACE
No? Oh... I'm surprised, I would have said yes, it did mean something.
GRACE
Trip, I --
GRACE
I let you stop me from being an artist.
TRIP
You let me --
GRACE
I was afraid, Trip okay?
GRACE
I -- I admit it.
GRACE
I didn't know if -- if I could do it, be a real artist...
(GONZALO gets up from the couch.)
GRACE
And I've been using you as an excuse for why I didn't do it.
(GONZALO picks up a trinket 1.)
(GONZALO puts down a trinket 1.)
(GONZALO picks up a trinket 1.)
(GONZALO puts down a trinket 1.)
(GONZALO picks up a trinket 1.)
(GONZALO puts down a trinket 1.)
GRACE
uhh...
TRIP
uhh...
GONZALO
Wow.
TRIP
Jesus...!
GRACE
Gonzalo, I --
TRIP
Gonzalo, I --
GRACE
What?!
TRIP
What?!
GRACE
This changes everything...
TRIP
Yes, it does change everything.
GONZALO
Should I be worried?
TRIP
I think it's over.
GRACE
Trip, what --
TRIP
No!!
TRIP
It's over, Grace, don't you see that?
GONZALO
Don't end it.
GRACE
Wha... I just told you --
TRIP
You just told me something about us you should have said a long time ago:
TRIP
You've been using me as an excuse to not be an artist...
TRIP
And no, Gonzalo, please...
GRACE
Trip, no, I... you...
TRIP
No, Grace, this isn't about you, or me, it's about us... Our marriage. I see that now.
GONZALO
Please, don't do this Trip.
GRACE
Us...? Our marriage...? What? No, wait!
TRIP
And no, Gonzalo, no more!
TRIP
Gonzalo, I'm sorry. You really helped us though, so, thanks.
GRACE
Trip!
(Trip closes the front door.)
(Trip opens the front door.)
GONZALO
I feel so bad right now.
GRACE
Trip!!
GRACE
Oh my God...
GRACE
I should have told him that...
GRACE
I could have told him that...
GONZALO
I'm sorry.
