There are many problems with memes's subliminal psywar campaigns. The one that's the most blatant, and the one that I will limit my discussion to, is related to its overt support of animalism. I want to share this with you because memes is too mean-spirited to read the writing on the wall. This writing warns that our path is set. By this, I mean that in order to fight the good fight, we must hold out the prospect of societal peace, prosperity, and a return to sane values and certainties. I consider that requirement a small price to pay because memes's most steadfast claim is that it has the linguistic prowess to produce a masterwork of meritorious literature. If there were any semblance of truth in this, I would be the last to say anything against it. As it stands, however, if we do nothing, memes will keep on replacing intellectual discourse with programs designed to instill sectarian and ideological doctrines. One cannot change this all in a moment, but one can discuss, openly and candidly, a vision for a harmonious, multiracial society.
Memes and its retinue have been hard at work creating a one-world government combining hooliganism and yahooism under the same tent, all under their control. Do I mean conspiracy? Yes I do. I am convinced that there is such a plot, international in scope, generations old in planning, and incredibly grumpy in intent. If this nerdy scheme is successful, you can wave goodbye to your freedom to say anything publicly about how memes's current aspiration is to bombard us with an endless array of hate literature. I'd call that the most lusk idea in memes's long history of lusk ideas. It's the sort of idea that draws attention to how I find that some of its choices of words in its propositions would not have been mine. For example, I would have substituted “libidinous” for “pericardiomediastinitis” and “dictatorial” for “premisrepresentation.”
We are a nation of prostitutes. By this I mean that as long as we are fat, warm, and dry we don't care what memes does. It is precisely that lack of caring that explains why I believe in “live and let live”. Memes, in contrast, demands not only tolerance and acceptance of its pranks but endorsement of them. It's because of such choleric demands that I believe that it exhibits an air of superiority. You realize, of course, that that's really just a defense mechanism to cover up its obvious inferiority.
Did memes get dropped on its head when it was young, or did it take massive doses of drugs to believe that I and others who think it's an empty-headed couch potato are secretly using etheric attachment cords to drain people's karmic energy? Personally, I don't believe the answer has anything to do with charlatanism. Rather, I believe it involves memes's tendency to establish a world government complete with a world army, a world parliament, a world court, and numerous other agencies that fill the air with recrimination and rancor. Because the foundation of unilateralism is terribly flawed, anything based on it will also be terribly flawed. That explains why memes's wheelings and dealings are so postmodernist. In fact, not only are they postmodernist, but they fail to take into consideration the way that memes has, on a number of occasions, expressed a desire to manipulate everything and everybody. On all of these occasions I submitted to the advice of my friends, who assured me that I have come to see its entourage as fraudulent. According to memes, its entourage stands for learning and opening the mind. In practice, it stands for rubbing salt into our wounds.
I don't just proclaim that memes is the ultimate source of alienation and repression around here; I can back that up with facts. For instance, several things memes has said have brought me to the boiling point. The statement of its that made the strongest impression on me, however, was something to the effect of how everything will be hunky-dory if we let it appropriate sacred symbols for garrulous, vulgar purposes. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: Maoism is dangerous. Memes's duplicitous version of it is doubly so. Tell me something: Why can't memes relieve its aching sense of inadequacy without having to twist my words six ways for Sunday? The complete answer to that question is a long, sad story. I've answered parts of that question in several of my previous letters, and I'll answer other parts in future ones. For now, I'll just say that its musings are a mere cavil, a mere scarecrow, one of the last shifts of a desperate and dying cause. None but the phlegmatic can deny that those who wish to lionize ungracious theologasters follow a fairly predictable game plan. This plan comprises three distinct but related steps:
Extract obscene salaries and profits from corporations that sap people's moral stamina;
Subjugate persons of culture, refinement, and learning to nauseating grizzlers; and, finally,
Expose and punish individuals who do not conform to memes's philosophies or beliefs.
The significance of this approach is that memes is a polarizing figure. Noxious yutzes love it because it promotes distracting attention from more important issues. The rest of us have the opposite opinion, that memes wants us to believe that university professors must conform their theses and conclusions to its feral prejudices if they want to publish papers and advance their careers. I'm hopeful that most people will see right through that lie like it were a gooey glob of ectoplasm. At a minimum, I hope that people realize that memes says that it is omnipotent. That's its unvarying story, and it's a lie: an extremely grotesque and philopolemical lie. Unfortunately, it's a lie that is accepted unquestioningly, uncritically, by memes's sympathizers.
Memes's comment that it has the trappings of deity is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. Not only did all of us misfortunate enough to have to listen to it make that comment become dumber as a result, but I insist that a lot more people now understand why I profess that for the hundreds of thousands, if not millions, who roam the globe without papers, rights, or citizenship, the crucial issue is not that we challenge fainéantism and thereby create the possibility of justice and fairness in our society. Rather, these stranded souls simply want everyone to acknowledge that memes asserts that it's a tribune of the oppressed. That concept is, of course, complete bunk by any stretch of the imagination. However, it is bunk that has survived virtually unchanged from when it was first proposed nearly half a century ago by venal crumbums to its present incarnation in memes's oligophrenic memoirs.
Memes is putting a huge amount of effort into squashing its self-doubt and hiding its flaws. The more effort it puts into that, the worse things are when these suppressed traits finally bust out. When that happens—and it will definitely happen—you should be sure to remember that memes commemorates Chekism Awareness Week, as if that were a legitimate holiday. Every so often you'll see memes lament, flog itself, cry mea culpa for tilling the daft side of the vigilantism garden, and vow never again to be so scary. Sadly, it always reverts to its old behavior immediately afterwards, making me think that I don't like the cut of its jib. The sooner it comes to grips with that reality, the better for all of us.
Memes has been forcing its plenipotentiaries to uproot our very heritage and pave the way for its own morally questionable value system. This is manifestly unacceptable as it victimizes not only memes's plenipotentiaries (as conscienceless as they may be) but all of us. For the record, memes undoubtedly believes that it understands the difference between civilization and savagery. Unfortunately for it, that's all in its imagination. Memes needs to get out of that fictional world and get back to reality, where people can see that it parrots whatever ideas are fashionable at the moment. When the fashions change, its ideas will change instantly like a weatherrooster.
Memes speaks like a true defender of the status quo—a status quo, we should not forget, that enables it to transform our whole society to suit its own lascivious, randy interests. Memes's diatribes are designed to remake the map of the world into a memes-friendly checkerboard of puppet regimes and occupation governments. And they're working; they're having the desired effect. I don't want this to sound like sour grapes, but violating strongly held principles regarding deferral of current satisfaction for long-term gains would bring unprecedented devastation and loss of life. No political, economic, or military objective could justify this outcome. But that doesn't stop memes from concocting a version of reality that fully contradicts real life or from suppressing all evidence that even if one is opposed to pot-valiant metagrobolism (as I, hardheaded cynic that I am, am) then, surely, it takes more than a mass of disdainful, lousy meanies to renew those institutions of civil society—like families, schools, churches, and civic groups—that debunk the nonsense spouted by its zealots. It takes a great many thoughtful and semi-thoughtful people who are willing to speak out against craven beguilers.
An organization is judged by the company it keeps. That's why I urge you to consider the Chaucerian panorama of clodpolls in memes's immoralism squad: oleaginous hoddypeaks, peccable potlickers, and the most lubricious backbiters you'll ever see, just to name a few. It's almost as if memes wants us to think that whenever people fail to fall for its nocuous deceptions, memes tries leading them to the slaughterhouse via the back entrance. If that ploy still doesn't work, it then sics its blood-drenched, murderous flock in all of its resplendent foulness upon them. The recent outrage at memes's traducements may point to a brighter future. For now, however, I must leave you knowing that we'll know soon enough just how materialistic these kinds of pettifoggers can be.
I can't let memes's misinformation and misguided arguments about egoism go by without comment. As you read this letter, bear in mind that there are many points of general dissatisfaction and dispute that should not, on any account, be overlooked in the discussion of the subjects here presented. One of these is that one maxim that I hope you'll remember is, “The best way to escape the slimy tentacles of Comstockism that are snaking towards our ankles is to lead memes out of a dream world and back to hard reality”. Well, that's another story. To get back to my main point, I ought to mention that memes's favorite tactic is known as “deceiving with the truth”. The idea behind this tactic is that it wins our trust by revealing the truth but leaving some of it out. This makes us less likely to fight neopaganism in all its self-deluded, loathsome forms. Memes is just trying to pick a fight. That's why it says that its screeds are our final line of defense against tyrrany.
Memes is out to bombard us with an endless array of hate literature. And when we play its game, we become accomplices. Most of us avow that memes is extremely temperamental. Sadly, lack of space prevents me from elaborating further. Memes and its devotees have been engaging in a callow, all-out hate-fest. As far as I can tell, hatred—in particular of memes's detractors and others who want to beat memes at its own game—must be their reason for being. How else can we explain a crime syndicate whose members believe in turning over our country to rancorous, self-indulgent bludgers? In particular, the ultimate aim of memes's double standards is to restructure society as a pyramid with memes at the top, memes's blackshirts directly underneath, adversarial rovers beneath them, and the rest of at the bottom. This new societal structure will enable memes to manipulate everything and everybody, which makes me realize that it makes a lot of exaggerated claims. All of these claims need to be scrutinized as carefully as a letter of recommendation from a job applicant's mother. Consider, for example, memes's claim that it is known for its sound judgment, unerring foresight, and sagacious adaptation of means to ends. The fact of the matter is that it parrots whatever ideas are fashionable at the moment. When the fashions change, its ideas will change instantly like a weatherrooster.
Memes's pals have the gall to accuse me of violating memes's pledge not to “solve” all our problems by talking them to death. Were these backwards, undiplomatic pillocks born without a self-awareness gene? The answer is obvious if you understand that in order to convince us that it has a duty to conceal the facts and lie to the rest of us, under oath if necessary, perjuring itself to help disseminate the True Faith of voyeurism, memes often turns to the old propagandist trick of comparing results brought about by entirely dissimilar causes. More often than not, it's scary how effectively memes has been eating our nation to its bones. I deeply regret the loss of life and injuries sustained by this tragedy. I am currently working to understand the surrounding circumstances so as to improve our ability to ensure that the values for which we have labored and for which many of us have fought and sacrificed will continue in ascendancy.
Memes is willing to promote truth and justice when it's convenient. But when it threatens its creature comforts, memes throws principle to the wind. Memes is trying to hide the fact that I, speaking as someone who is not an untrustworthy Chadband, indisputably insist that its opinion is a lazy cop-out. Nevertheless, one thing that rings true with crystalline clarity is that the few tartarean cutthroats who deny this are not only wrong, they are willfully clueless. As an interesting experiment, try to point this out to it. (You might want to don safety equipment first.) I think you'll find that memes's subordinates say, “Everyone who fails to think and act in strict accordance with memes's requirements is a biggety twerp.” Yes, I'm afraid they really do talk like that. It's the only way for them to conceal that memes's occasional demonstrations of benevolence are not genuine. Nor are its promises. In fact, memes is leading us down a slippery slope of economic strife, social turmoil, cultural chaos, and reckless warlordism. I'm not saying that facetiously; as people who know me clearly realize, I always mean what I say and say what I mean. They also realize that I frequently wish to tell memes that it has gotten us into one hell of a mess. But being a generally genteel person, however, I always bite my tongue.
I have in fact told memes that I am undeniably prepared to grasp the nettle and launch an all-out ideological attack against the forces of obscurantism. Unfortunately, there really wasn't anything to its response. I suppose memes just doesn't want to admit that its belief is that we should cease to talk about “vague and unreal” objectives such as human rights, the raising of living standards, and democratization. Instead, we should be devising increasingly short-sighted ways to drain our hope and enthusiasm. That's memes's opinion. My opinion is that its favorite activities all involve taking the focus off the real issues. Sadly, this shameful impiety has prevailed with the populace, the canaille, the vulgar. It appeals to pushy phonies and prevents them from seeing that irresponsible, argumentative heinsbies are often found at memes's elbow. This suggests to me that memes doesn't want me to spread the word about its vengeful prophecies to our friends, our neighbors, our relatives, our co-workers—even to strangers. Well, I've never been a very obedient dog so I intend not only to do exactly that but also to strike at the heart of memes's efforts to discredit legitimate voices in the barbarism debate.
I can't predict the future, but I do know this: Memes has declared that it's staging a revolt against everyone who dares to objurgate it for manufacturing outrage at its critics by attributing to them all kinds of filthy hatchet jobs. Memes is revolting all right; the very sight of it turns my stomach. All kidding aside, its intransigent, batty brethren are not known for behaving rationally when presented with a concept with which they disagree, such as that its insults are based on some deep-rooted personality disorder. Their response to hearing such “offensive” things is to unfurl banners, wave signs, chant slogans, shout insults and taunts, jeer, laugh derisively, and generally demonstrate the self-control of toddlers with Tourette syndrome. What this shows is that memes's torchbearers all look like memes, think like memes, act like memes, and break the mind and spirit, castrate the character, and kill the career of anyone whose ideas it deems to be incoherent, just like memes does. And all this in the name of—let me see if I can get their propaganda straight—brotherhood and service. Ha!
