Author Topic: Kane and Lynch: Dead Men.  (Read 1165 times)

Wow I'm late. I've had it for a while but just picked it up recently. Couldn't beat the dumptruck on co-op.

Anyway, the more I play through it, the more I loving hate it. I'm on what appears to be the last level, and jesus christ I'm going out of my mind trying to stay alive and protect Jenny. Goddamnit Kane is bad at planning stuff out.

Combat:
Unless you know how a carbine works, gtfo. Short, controlled bursts or you won't do any damage to anything, even if you have the best weapon in the game (If there is such thing. RPG-7 maybe). Blind fire is useless too. Enemies don't cower from cover fire, and the spray of bullets isn't enough to kill anything more than 10 feet in front of you. Aiming is necessary ALL THE TIME. Even Call of Duty 4, shooting from the hip isn't totally worthless.

Cover System:
Broken. It snaps to cover sometimes, and usually only when it's not needed.

Aiming and Weapons:
Boring. Weapon variety is determined by the sound the gun makes and how much your camera shakes. I found myself using the default weapons because everything else was less accurate.

Storyline:
Okay. It makes stuff sense, but whatever.

Visuals:
Most of the levels are pretty bland, not much detail. I can't tell if it's realistic or not, it's just weird. First level feels like Duke 3D, and the town feels totally abandon.

Playthrough:
Linear. Linear linear linear. There is no real decision making, just run n' gun. Wouldn't be bad if everything else was broken. For example, you're sneaking through the cliffs and you come to a part I assumed you're supposed to use your suppressed pistol to kill a scout while you sneak down the river. NOPE can't do that stuff, everyone's on us and it degraded to kill 'em all. Oh, and another thing. Can't rush the objective, because if you don't kill every motherforgeter taking potshots, you're screwed. Your health bar doesn't exist. A few rounds and you die.

DIFFICULTY:
By far the most BROKEN AND BULLstuff thing about this game. I'm on Aspirin, the easiest difficulty there is, and it's still RIDICULOUSLY loving HARD. I can't even imagine what a nightmare medium would be.

AI:
2nd most broken thing. They take their time healing you (You die so much its unbelievable), get shot, and do virtually nothing of any use besides hitting something with a stray bullet. Play in co-op or get forgeted. Actually, you're forgeted even in co-op, I'll bet.

Co-Op:
I can at least give it credit for being one of the few games centered on co-op play, even boasting the now-legendary splitscreen, but it doesn't make up for anything other than making the game slightly less difficult.

Verdict: Don't buy, don't play, don't see. Unless you have fun giving yourself aneurysms out of pure frustration, just pass it up. Yes, it's in the bargain bin, but don't tread those waters.

Eidos is going to ban you for not liking their game.

Don't play to the end or the ending will piss you off.

I'm not going to bother beating it, I'm watching the ending on youtube.

Well if that's the case then there are two.

..Though you probably found this out already.

WOW. Just WOW. That ending was terrible. God, this game was terrible.

The ending made it seem like the whole game was pointless.

You can still make a bad ending and make it feel like you did something...

Both endings are utterly pointless. Bad one, Jenny lives but she hates you. Good one, Jenny dies and everyone still hates you. You just can't win in this game.

got this on steam in feb, found it fun but the nightclub level was confusing and crowded D: also dark

Dump Truck, worst level ever, its the only level me and my friends cannot get past. We even read a guide and it still didn't help what so ever.

Yeah, same. I beat it on singleplayer:
Shoot at the windows in short, controlled bursts, when it comes out you, get out of the way.

The helicopter was a bitch.

Took me like 2 hours. The loading times only worsened the injury each time I died.

The heli took me 5 tries. Easy after I found the stash of RPG-7's, and figured out it stops strafing.

This game would become much more better if it weren't for the high recoil. The recoil ruined the experience for me, the only stable SMG was the MP5.
« Last Edit: June 18, 2009, 10:53:29 PM by koolkody12 »

I also think it's pointless to say 'loving!' in a game every 5 seconds. It kinda gets annoying. I bought this game and it was a waste of money!