Your mother is so fat that she got a heart attack and died at your most impressionable age and now you are a lonely, depressed child with no friends and will never find happiness in the rest of your life, leading others to assume you will commit Self Delete. You never find a way to commit Self Delete, so your life drags on with meaningless, and everybody that knows you hates you and wants to kill you because you are such a downer that your mood spreads with your surrounding population. Eventually these people that hate you get together and torture you, then shove you in a coffin and bury you alive. You dig yourself out, and the rednecks that saw you think you are a zombie and shoot your head. Unfortunately you don't die, so you live the rest of your life brain dead because no doctor would ever want to touch your pathetic, lonely, depressing body.
