Jokes.

[Julius The 1st]

Four Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee.

The first Catholic man tells his friends, "My son is a priest, when he walks into a room, everyone calls him 'Father'."

The second Catholic man chirps, "My son is a Bishop. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Grace'."

The third Catholic gent says, "My son is a Cardinal.. When he enters a roomeveryone says 'Your Eminence'."

The fourth Catholic man then says, "My son is the Pope. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Holiness'."

Since the lone Catholic woman was sipping her coffee in silence, the four men give her a subtle, "Well....?"

She proudly replies, "I have a daughter, slim, tall, 38D breast, 24" waist and 34" hips. When she walks into a room, people say, "Oh My God."

[Ad Bot]

[Night Fox]

Why did the kid drop his ice cream cone?
He was hit by a bus.

Do I go to Hell for laughing at these?

[Kira100000]

Do I go to Hell for laughing at these?

Knock knock

Who's there?





The police, your wife is dead.

[Night Fox]

But I don't have a wife!
:U

[aml]

But I don't have a wife!
:U

You do now and apparently she is dead.

[Kira100000]

But I don't have a wife!
:U

That's that you think

[otto-san]

Argon walks into a bar.

The bartender says "Sorry, we don't serve noble gases here."

Argon doesn't react.


How many ears does Spock have?
Three.
The left ear, the right ear, and the final front ear.


Your mother is so fat, her potronus is a cake.

[Mikiyikiy]

What smells like red paint?




Blue paint.

[Night Fox]

jokes c:

The first two made me laugh.
c:

[fred da kiko]

what do you call a black man driving a plane.....





A PILOT, is funny joke yes?

[otto-san]

The first two made me laugh.
c:

hue

Two Chemists walk into a bar, one says to the bartender " I'll Have a cup of H2O"

He gives it to him, the other bartender asks for a cup of H2O too, a few minutes later he dies.


What's Einsteins Theory for musicians?

E = F flat


If a pizza has a radius of Z and a height of A, its volume can be defined by Pi*Z*Z*A.

[Kira100000]

What smells like red paint?




Blue paint.

that made me laugh...

too much

[fred da kiko]

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple?






BEING VIOLENTLY RAPED BY A GIANT MUTANT SCORPION! is funny joke yes?

[Anti-Block]

A man walks into a doctors office with a carrot up his nose. The Doctor takes one look at him and says, "Well, you aren't eating properly".

A man goes to a houseware store to pick up some plates. He looks around for quite a while, and finally a store aid walks over to him and inquires about his search.
     "Well, it's coming close to Christmas time, and I want some nice plates for my guests. The only problem is that all my other plates I've been buying continue to erode when coming in direct contact with my wife's famous Hollandaise sauce."
The store aid thinks for a minute and suggest he get some chrome plates. When the man asks why, he simply states
     "There's no plates like chrome for the Hollandaise!"

[otto-san]

A man walks into a doctors office with a carrot up his nose. The Doctor takes one look at him and says, "Well, you aren't eating properly".

A man goes to a houseware store to pick up some plates. He looks around for quite a while, and finally a store aid walks over to him and inquires about his search.
     "Well, it's coming close to Christmas time, and I want some nice plates for my guests. The only problem is that all my other plates I've been buying continue to erode when coming in direct contact with my wife's famous Hollandaise sauce."
The store aid thinks for a minute and suggest he get some chrome plates. When the man asks why, he simply states
     "There's no plates like chrome for the Hollandaise!"

I see what you did there.