Hello everyone, and welcome to the Lulu news 9:00 report.
Yes, we're back on the air, after some... technical difficulties... and hopefully for good now. Hopefully. For good.
Anyways, first up, news from the war on Bronyism.
Another ABO airbase was reportedly found and assaulted by Brony forces in Shinjia, last week.
The outcome of thr battle is unclear, and the airbase has reportedly... get this, it's completely dissappeared! Not a trace! Imagine that!
Anyway, the soldiers involved in the battle have also dissappeared.
The only survivor has said that the base and all the soldiers were, "sucked into a giant space hole."
He's in a mental hospital now, so there's no need to hide yo kids.
On other fronts, Technology seems to be regressing quite a bit, as both sides have resorted to WWI-style trench warfare.
When asked why, ABO officials replied, "We freaking wanted to. Is there something wrong that?"
Next up, a personal story.
I have been charged with starting the "Think of X before entering," fad.
Please send me money and/or lawyers, so that I may-
(whispering)
Huh?
Ratings? I don- (whispering)
Hey! I don't give a stuff about your goddamn ratings! Why don't you take your ratings, and shove them up your-
(whispering)
We'll be back after this commercial break.
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