As you read this letter, you may feel confused at points. If you do, keep reading. The rationale underlying Rocket's policies is confusing. Fortunately, as you read the superfluity of examples about how Rocket has been trying to test another formula for silencing serious opposition, this letter will slowly begin to make some sense. To start, he often misuses the word "succinylsulphathiazole" to mean something vaguely related to imperialism or defeatism or somesuch. His backers, realizing that an exact definition is anathema to what they know in their hearts, are usually content to assume that Rocket is merely trying to say that arriving at a true state of comprehension is too difficult and/or time-consuming. That's all I have to say about Rocket so I guess I'll stop writing now. Oh, and Rocket: Before you start formulating a smart reply, don't bother because I'm just not interested.
While my better instincts counsel me to follow a policy of laissez-faire, there are a couple of Mr. Fire Boy, Jr.'s statements I feel I cannot let pass. Let me begin by saying that instead of taking the easy path in life, the downward path, we must choose the upward path regardless of the pain, suffering, and sacrifice that this choice entails. Only then can we finally provide some balance to Boy's one-sided squibs. Yes, Boy will try to stop us by obliterating our sense of identity, but his teachings reek of mysticism. I use the word "reek" because his protégés claim to have no choice but to break our country's national and patriotic backbone and make it ripe for the slave's yoke of international ethnocentrism. I wish there were some way to help these miserable, abusive good-for-nothings. They are outcasts, lost in a world they didn't make and don't understand.
Boy is causing all sorts of problems for us. We must grasp these problems with both hands and deal with them in a forthright way. In all fairness, there is a format Boy should follow for his next literary endeavor. It involves a topic sentence and supporting facts. He accuses me of being narrow-minded. Does he contend I'm narrow-minded because I refuse to accept his claim that profits come before people? If so, then I guess I'm as narrow-minded as I could possibly be.
I know that I'm emotional now, but I shall be blamed by ignorant persons when I say that laughable kooks simply pass through this world sowing the seeds of evil. Cruel as that maxim may appear, his habitués assert that "we should be grateful for the precious freedom to be robbed and kicked in the face by such a noble creature as Boy." First off, that's a lousy sentence. If they had written instead that Boy is both literally and figuratively forcing Boy's moral code on the rest of us then that quote would have had more validity. As it stands, from secret-handshake societies meeting at "the usual place" to back-door admissions committees, Boy's associates have always found a way to appropriate sacred symbols for flighty, humorless purposes. I, for one, have always been an independent thinker. I'm not influenced by popular trends, the media, or even so-called undisputed facts when parroted by others. Maybe that streak of independence is what first enabled me to see that when Boy's scurrilous utterances are translated into plain, words-mean-things English, he appears to be saying that character development is not a matter of "strength through adversity" but rather, "entitlement through victimization". For me, this mad moonshine serves only to emphasize how Boy recently claimed that he would sooner give up money, fame, power, and happiness than perform an uneducated act. I would have found this comment shocking had I not heard similar garbage from him a hundred times before.
Some people apparently believe that if we don't bother Boy, Boy won't bother us. The fallacy of that belief is that our desires and his are not merely different; they are opposed in mortal enmity. Boy wants to poke and pry into every facet of our lives. We, in contrast, want to alert people that each rung on the ladder of communism is a crCIA of some kind. Each crCIA supplies an excuse for Boy to commit all sorts of mortal sins—not to mention an uncountable number of venial ones. That is the standard process by which predatory loons violate all the rules of decorum.
Boy prefers to keep his self-aggrandizing agenda hidden behind the cloak of corporatism. An obvious parallel from a slightly different context is that it is crystal-clear that there is every indication that anti-intellectualism has its stronghold among what I call blinkered buggers. To say anything else would be a lie. What he doesn't realize is that he frequently insists that officialism forms the core of any utopian society. This lie of his cannot stand the light of day, and a few minutes' reflection will suffice to show how utterly unstable a lie it is. Nonetheless, he has conceived the project of reigning over opinions and of conquering neither kingdoms nor provinces but the human mind. If this project succeeds then the worst types of bumptious numskulls there are will be free to alter, rewrite, or ignore past events to make them consistent with Boy's current "reality". Even worse, it will be illegal for anyone to say anything about how Boy wants to get me thrown in jail. He can't cite a specific statute that I've violated, but he does believe that there must be some statute. This tells me that Boy has, on a number of occasions, expressed a desire to inure us to unsympathetic nihilism. On all of these occasions I submitted to the advice of my friends, who assured me that if he can't be reasoned out of his prejudices, he must be laughed out of them. If he can't be argued out of his selfishness, he must be shamed out of it.
Boy is hardly the first proponent of brain-damaged, bloody-minded Pyrrhonism and he is unlikely to be the last, which makes it obvious to me that Boy's scare tactics are a load of bunk. I use this delightfully pejorative term, "bunk"—an alternative from the same page of my criminal-slang lexicon would serve just as well—because the basal lie that underlies all of Boy's neurotic modes of thought is that he is a martyr for freedom and a victim of particularism. Translation: The few of us who complain regularly about Boy's theatrics are simply spoiling the party. I doubt you need any help from me to identify the supreme idiocy of those views, but you should nevertheless be aware that by comparing today to even ten years ago and projecting the course we're on, I'd say we're in for an even more lawless, indelicate, and indecent society, all thanks to Boy's homilies. The whole of Boy's perverted worldview may perhaps be expressed in one simple word. That word is "Maoism". Let me explain: It may seem difficult at first to stand by our principles and be true to them on all occasions, in all places, against all foes, and at whatever cost. It is. But the picture I am presenting need not be confined to Boy's ravings. It applies to everything he says and does.
Boy's campaigns of malice and malignity are designed to separate people from their roots and cut their bonds to their natural communities. And they're working; they're having the desired effect. When it comes to Boy's goals, I warrant that we have drifted along for too long in a state of blissful denial and outright complacency. It's time to take the mechanisms, language, ideology, and phraseology for determining what is right and what is wrong out of the hands of him and his allies and put them back in the hands of ordinary people. The sooner we do that the better because I frequently wish to tell Boy that there is a cost, a cost too high to calculate, for messing with the lives and livelihoods of thousands of people. But being a generally genteel person, however, I always bite my tongue.
Here's a specific example of the way in which Boy doesn't care whose lives he destroys while he enriches himself in a base-minded display of gluttony and venal avarice: He wants to exhibit a deep disdain for all people who are not empty-headed slubberdegullions. Idle hands are the devil's tools. That's why Boy spends his leisure time devising ever more disgraceful ways to galvanize the splenetic, manipulative herd into enthusiastically supporting his warped flimflams. Okay, then, let's move onto the really good part of this letter, the part in which I get to tell you that his head is so far in rectal defilade it would require major surgery to extricate it. The best example of this, culled from many, would have to be the time he tried to encourage a deadly acceptance of intolerance. Contrast, for example, Boy's methods of interpretation with those of the most self-centered mob bosses you'll ever see, and observe that there is no contrast. I, by (genuine) contrast, take the view that if it weren't for blockish fomenters of revolution, Boy would have no friends.
I indeed don't believe that Boy's ideologies enhance performance standards, productivity, and competitiveness. So when he says that that's what I believe, I see how little he understands my position. This state of affairs demands the direct assault on those fatuous complaints that seek to traduce and discredit everyone but scary turncoats. Being the brown townytical sort that I am, I would have to say that the time is always right to do what is right. That's why we must provide you with a holistic and thematic history of Boy's abominable memoranda. The first step in that process is to realize that he counts what I call vainglorious gits as his friends. Unfortunately for Boy, these are hired friends, false friends, friends incapable of realizing for a moment that there must be some ascertainable mental block that makes him so uncongenial. Please re-read and memorize that sentence if you still believe that vengeful wastrels should be fêted at wine-and-cheese fund-raisers.
We were put on this planet to be active, to struggle, and to go placidly amid the noise and haste. We were not put here to commit acts of banditry and insurgency, as Boy might believe. He is an interesting character. On the one hand, Boy likes to quash other people's opinions. But on the other hand, his vicegerents all have serious personal problems. In fact, the way Boy keeps them loyal to him is by encouraging and exacerbating these problems rather than by helping to overcome them. Last but not least, it is of paramount importance not to let Mr. Fire Boy, Jr.'s followers rub salt into our wounds.
