Me: (To dad) Someone on the Blockland forum made a thread about going on a luxury cruise. How come we don't ever go on vacations like that?
Dad: Vacations are all just a matter of comparison.
Me: Huh?
Dad: We spend a week in cold, uncomfortable tents each year so living here the rest of the time seems like a luxury cruise. If your trips are unpleasant, your whole life is a vacation!
Me: (To mom) Please tell me I'm adopted.