Your right leg grows fur permanently. Your right hand bursts into flames twice.
An apocalyptic flaming hailstorn rends the land and then you turn into a lizard.
You turn into a dog, then you turn into a snake, and finally your vision improves.
You become an earth (not plant) elemental. Plants grow rapidly near you.
It is hot and dry outside and then you burst into flames.
Your left hand grows an identical one right next to it and then you grow a fluffy tail the color of your hair for an hour.
All of your limbs turn brick red and then you turn into a lizard twice.
Your right leg turns forest green and bursts into flames, then you turn into a griffin.
Your hair turns blue and begins glowing, then you feel your energy drained away.
There is a light drizzle of rain and then you turn into a wolf.
The moon is full in the sky and then you turn into a falcon for the rest of the day.
Your right ear turns silver and shrivels, then everyone in the room becomes a teenager.
Local gravity reverses permanently.
You grow a pair of white feathery wings twice.
You punch the first person you see, but only for a few minutes.
It is hot and dry outside and then you die instantly.
You turn into a unicorn, then you get a free wish, and finally your hearing improves.
Your ass gains the powers of Mr. Fantastic for a week. Your navel is cured of any maladies permanently.
You turn into a bear, then you become inexplicably aroused, and finally everyone in the room becomes a teenager.
You have an incredible climax for an hour.
Your snake, if any, bleeds, but only for a few minutes.
Do i win?