I've been preparing for this for the past 5 years. This will be the best 4th ever.
Firstly, I've assembled a mortar system to fire actual RPG-18 rockets, varied between high explosive and phosphorus-coated shrapnel. These are simply to get the attention of the town. Once I have their attention, I will detonate 49 cans of burning hot, colored, glowing phosphorus. Much like the RPG shells. They will be detonated with a small gunpowder charge, and they go around the entire town in a large circle.
At this point, peoples' ears will be ringing from the high explosive anti-tank rockets, and then they will be blinded by glowing hot, colored, phosphorus. (which will also probably start a massive array of fires.) After the intro, I will launch my standard array of 4th of July standard fireworks, small mortars with the colored multistages, all of that good stuff.
After they think the beautiful display of horror and beauty is over, I will drive my car in to the town center, packed with high explosive RPG-18 rockets, cans of phosphous, plastic explosives, and a bunch of M-80's and some old firecrackers for good luck, and detonate it. It will leave a crater easily over 100 feet in diameter, and the sky will glow red for a short five minutes after.
4th in Maine.
