[100x70] Cerebrated Chronicles - Who thought a party of 8 was a good idea?

[?]

yosher's story is fork and spoon run away to mexico compared to this

[Ad Bot]

[Menen]

so you expected me to make it insanely interesting from the first image?

No, but you expect every turn to be interesting.

That is not good story telling. There is no such thing as a roller coaster that only goes up. The flat parts build suspense!

does imagining things in bulk lower the cost if you imagined them individually? Because you should imagine a bazillion anvils above the guy

Nope. Still costs the same

[Aces]

so you expected me to make it insanely interesting from the first image?

It's not interesting at all yet.

So yeah you've got time.

[Yosher]

yosher's story is fork and spoon run away to mexico compared to this

what does this even mean

[Menen]

what does this even mean

It's not interesting at all yet.

[Yosher]

what can i do to make it more interesting?

or better: what do you find boring about it?
i need to know this so i can improve

[Tingalz]

what does this even mean

He means your adventure is cheesy and terrible. For forgets sake, the bad guys in your story are literally called "The Dark Side".
Stop stuffting up this thread.

[Menen]

what can i do to make it more interesting?

or better: what do you find boring about it?
i need to know this so i can improve

Reading the Dialog is hard.

Use little face Icons or colors or something. And make it less terrible anime sounding

[Aces]

what can i do to make it more interesting?

or better: what do you find boring about it?
i need to know this so i can improve

The enemies are generic and don't speak like an enemy would speak.
It's like watching Beyblade or Bakugan.
They should actually sound like somebody who wants the protagonists dead.

And improve the artwork. Motion blurs are not all you require to make something look less hideous.

And improve the combat. I want to actually see that people can die rather than having fast combat that required no struggle at all. (I've been guilty of this in a few adventures.

[HellHound]

Imagine something heavy above the guy to knock him out. Interrogate him when he wakes.

[Menen]

You shout some PROFANITIES. Black text symbols appear in the air in front of you.



They also fall in the water. When you attempt to make more black text symbols appear it doesn't work. Maybe IT ONLY WORKS ONCE A DAY.



THE OLD GEEZER IS STEALING YOUR INGOT!



: DROP THE INGOT, OLD MAN!

: Aahh... my stomach. That really hurt, young man!
: Is THIS the face of a caring indvidiual? No! START TALKING!
: W-What do you want, Menen?
: How the... HOW DOES EVERYONE KNOW MY NAME?
: Im Lord Uviso's Second-In-Command. We have been spying on you all day.
: So you saw-
: Yes. Quite impressive. You saved Lord Uviso some time by killing those two.
: However I am not sure who teleported them away...
: Ok shut up now. Who are you?! What are you doing?! Where are you going?! Why did you try to take my Ingot?! Start talking or this Question mark will be fish hooked trough your jaw!
: Well my name is Gregory. I am currently running an errand. I saw your "Ingot" sitting in the water and naturally I picked it up.
: ...However since your powers have emerged maybe I don't need Carther anymore...
: What are you talking about? Who's Carther? Powers?
: The man that attacked you near the shops. He was sent to spy on you by Davis and Martin against Lord Uviso's wishes. Now hes jailed. Thanks a lot.
: HE ATTACKED ME!
: It isn't his fault. He was born with a rare kind of magic. He is extremely powerful but he is... mentally delayed.
: So hes handicapped?
: If you want to be blunt about it, yes.
: You're wasting my time. Just tell me something important... or something. I'm getting really bored.
: You'll look great in a cage.
: What?-

 

[Alteration]

:However since your powers have emerged maybe I don't need Carther anymore...
: What are you talking about? Who's Carther? Powers?

I saw that ninja.

==>

[Menen]

I saw that ninja.

==>

A minor Revision.

[HellHound]

Have mental conversation with yourself.

[Menen]

Have mental conversation with yourself.

GO INTO DREAM PLAINS?

Y/N