| | : ...Trry loossin two legs...
: Captain, why don't you get a drink and sit down?
: Sure. How have things been down here?
: The usual. I heard that last mission of yours was a bit intense.
: Oh yeah, that. It got even weirder on the bridge.
: Hhey I COULD have got a rem- a rematch, but that one bitch wassall like- like "ooh captain we gotta ru"--
: Try and ignore Ulris, he's pretty wasted right now. Anyways, what happened on the bridge?
: Yeah, you and Tyrell never tell us what's going on. I heard from someone that there's this unidentified blue ship out there fighting the iconians.
: Are you wearing a ushanka?
: You're dodging the question.
: Uh, well, after I got back to the bridge, we noticed that the iconian capital ship was communicating with the weird blue craft. So, naturally, we listened in.
: What did they say!?
: He was getting to that, don't interrupt.
: It turns out, the blue ship belongs to the shady armored people who I'm going to refer to as "illuminati" from now on. Anyways, the iconian admiral was arguing with the illuminati guy over who has the artifact. It turns out, neither of them did, and Tom's ran off with it.
: Crazy bastard.
: Then from out of nowhere, the illuminati guy claimed he has an idea, and the comm went silent. Ten seconds later, his ship shoots a giant beam straight at the planet, vaporizing the temple and everything around it.
: Guess Tom's dead.
: The iconian was pissed, and suddenly energy levels sharply rose on the surface of the planet. Then the Illuminati guy explained, get this, the artifact was a container, and he had just released an eldritch.
Johnathan nearly chokes on his drink.
: You're stuffting me. There was a real life eldritch back there?
: Well boy are we lucky to be ali-
: You shoulda tried to kill it. Then we'd all be famous like all those eldritch hunters.
: Pfft. Eldritch hunting is a myth. Anyone knows that a crappy pirate ship doesn't have the--
: SO, the iconian admiral started calling in backup, and the transmission ended. We were about to get out of there, when the illuminati ship turned around, headed straight for us, and hailed.
: No way.
: It got confusing from there. He pretty much told me that he knew we were listening in, and he wouldn't blow us up because he's in a good mood. I asked a couple questions, like "who are you?", but I only got vague answers. He said he released the eldritch to spread the iconian hegemony's resources thin so he could attack somewhere, but I have no idea where or how.
: This is great. It's like we're in the middle of a conspiracy.
: Oh yeah, he also said that I'm not allowed to tell anyone outside the ship about this, because he'll know and we'll all die. I think he's serious, so don't go repeating this story.
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