I had a copy of the episode and decided (since why not) to write it out. This IS an actual banned/lost episode.
If any of you guys reading this are people that can't stand swear words (which I think is entirely handicapped) than do not read this.
Dexter's Rude Removal
[Our view pans into Dexter working on some machine]
"Ahh. My latest, greatest work is just about completed." He said, admiring the machine. Dexter made a thumbs up motion and looked through one eye at his machine before saying:
"Hmm. One more adjustment to the flix module."
[As Dexter continues working, our view switches to the lab door]
Dee Dee peeked into the room with a grin on her face, before skipping over signs that read
'Danger!'
'Stop!'
'Do not enter!'
She looked over at 2 green canisters that had tubes leading to where Dexter was working.
"Ooh! Dexters got gas!" She said, pointing to the canisters before flipping over them. She landed on the pipe, and it curled in front of her.
When she finished her move, she grasped the tube, causing the gas to stop flowing through the tool Dexter was using. Dexter took off his mask and looked in a confused state as Dee Dee held back all of the gas. He aimed the gas nozzle at his face.
Just then, Dee Dee let go of the tube, causing an explosion to burn Dexter. Once it was done, he points the tube away, where we can see his black, pulled back hair, and his anggry expression.
"Whacha doin?" An overly exciting (and annoying) Dee Dee asked. "Are you making a shrink ray? Hmm?"
"Or a remote control that can turn you into animals? Hmm?" She continued rambling on.
"Or is it just another dumb robot? Hmm? What is it? Huh? Huh?" She said, leaning her head on Dexters just to annoy him.
"Shut up, shut up, shut up!" Dexter shouted in a small fit of rage. "So you want to know what my ingenious invention is, do you?"
"You know it, bro!" Dee Dee replied, giving a wink and snapping her finger to point at Dexter.
"It is going, thats what it is!" Dexter replied in a shouting tone. "This machine has the ability to remove and contain the most annoying personality trait known to man."
"Rudeness." Dexter finished.
He raised his arms to show the machine behind him. It had two chambers on the left and right of a big control panel.
"Behold, the rude removal system!" He announced. "Okay, listen. To simplify this, Dee Dee minus rude equals happy dexter." He said, with a smile on his face.
Dee Dee argued to this in an annoying tone.
"Oh yeah? You're the rude one, brother!" She said, poking her finger on his glasses.
He smacked her hand as he snapped back:
"It is YOU that is rude!"
"No, you!" She countered.
"You!" They argued, for a few minutes, until Dee Dee finally said something else.
"You're right Dexter, I am the rude one!" She concluded.
She turned over to a smirking Dexter and kicked him into one of the buttons on the machine. "See?" She mocked.
'Rude Removal system, activated.' The machine spoke.
Both ignored it, and started fighting until both of them flew into the chamber, and continued fighting.
'Rude removal procedure beginning now.' The machine spoke again.
They both noticed what was happening. Dexter started banging on the class walls of the cylinder chamber while Dee Dee held her finger up to her mouth and spoke something that outside of the machine people couldn't hear.
Pictures on the machine flashed as a gas flew from the chamber they were in to the other one.
'Rude removal system completed.' The machine concluded, opening the doors. Dexter and Dee Dee stared in wonder as the gas was in the other chamber.
"Bravo, Dexter. Your rude removal system is a smashing success!" Dee Dee said in a british accent.
"Quite." Dexter added. "Like I said before, it takes the rudeness of a person and removes it, and then contains it." He said, in a better, more understandable accent than usual.
[Screen pans over to the other chamber]
The gas started to fade away, and two figures were shown. One of them was Dee Dee and the other was Dexter. Their hair was messed up, and not like usual. They both had angry expressions on their faces as the door opened.
"Where the forget are we?" The rude Dexter asked.
"Beats the stuff out of me!" The rude Dee Dee replied. They both seemed to have a boston accent.
"Why you're in Dexter's laboratory, silly!" The kind Dexter explained as both did poses. They went to normal stance as the nice Dexter continued.
"I'm Dexter, and this golden-haired angel behind me is my charming sister, Dee Dee!" He concluded.
"Charmed!" The kind Dee Dee said as she did a curtsie.
"Dah, forget off!" The rude Dexter yelled.
The two kind ones covered their mouths in an expression of shock, and gasped.
"Oh dear!" They both said. "Ahem. Excuse me, but we think that was very rude and we are in want of an apology." The nice Dexter continued.
The rude dexter grabbed the nice Dexter by the shirt and put a fist near his face.
"Yeah, here's your loving apology!" The rude Dexter yelled.
Dexter shivered, and then they heard the mothers voice from upstairs.
"Kids, lunch time!" She yelled.
The rude Dexter dropped the nice Dexter.
"Lunch time, I'm loving starving!" The rude Dexter yelled as the two ran off.
Kind Dee Dee looked over at a fallen Kind Dexter.
"Dexter, I'm sorry those meanies broke your machine and made you look like a wimp." She said, face full of concern.
"It's okay, Dee Dee. Maybe they'll be in better spirits after they eat some of mom's delicious cooking!" Dexter replied. "Mmm!" They both stated as they licked their lips.
[Camera goes to the kitchen]
Rude Dee Dee kicked down the door, and both of them had an expression of anger. The mother held a pot of food and was stirring it while humming.
"Hey, kids!" She said in a loving tone. "Have a seat, I'll be right with you." She finished.
Rude Dexter and Rude Dee Dee pushed each other and fought over the chair before Dee Dee won and pushed Dexter off onto the floor.
"I hope you kids are hungry because I made a-" The mother said, walking towards the table. "Very special recipe that I got at a very special betty crocker fabula-" She scrambled as she tripped over Dexter.
She put the food down on the table as she fell to the ground.
"I hope you like it!" She said, dazed a bit, and got back up. "Well, what do you think, Dexter?"
"I think it tastes like stuff!" The rude Dexter yelled with his mouth full at his mother. He spit out his food at his very shocked mother's face, and she fainted to the ground groaning.
"Gots to find some loving food!" The rude Dexter stormed off to the fridge while the rude Dee Dee stuck her face in her bowl and ate like a pig.
"No! No! Uh-uh! Nada! No way! Ah! Ohh." He yelled as he threw random things out of the fridge. He gasped, as he pulled out a pie. "Come to papa."
The mother got up, dazed, and looked over at Dexter with the pie.
"Dexter! No, absolutely not! You cannot have any desert!" The mom yelled at the rude Dexter.
"Why? You want it all to yourself?" He snapped.
The mother fainted over in shock.
"Hey, wheres the loving candy?" She yelled as she threw cans out of the cabinet she was searching through. One of the cans hit rude Dexter's head as he was eating the pie.
"Hey! loving watch where you're throwing that, ass!" He yelled in anger.
"Okay, I will!" She said, throwing a can at Dexter's head with a smirk.
"Hey! Food fight!" The rude Dexter yelled as he threw the pie at Dee Dee. Dee Dee yelled as Dexter laughed. Dee Dee threw a watermelon at the rude Dexter, leaving him to fall on the ground.
She laughed back, and then the two were throwing everything they could find. The mom woke up, and was angry.
"Stop this this instant! I've had just about enough of you two! Now clean up this mess and go to your rooms forever!" She screamed.
"Look, lady, thats cute and all, but let me tell you something. I make my own loving rules! So why don't you do what all good mothers are supposed to do and clean it up yourself!?" The rude Dexter yelled back. "So long, tuts!" He continued as they both walked away.
The mom had an expression of pure rage.
[View goes to the living room]
"Hey look, it's dorkster and dumb-dumb!" The rude Dexter yelled as he pointed at the nice pair. "Say, nancy-pants, your mom wants you!" He finished.
"Oh my, mother! We must see what she wants!" The nice Dexter said softly. "So you're off then?" He asked the two rude ones.
"Yeah, we're going to go forget up your lab!" The rude Dexter exclaimed as they ran up the stairs.
"Well, their nice enough fellows once you get to know them." The nice Dexter said, turning to the nice Dee Dee. "A little rough around the edges, but-"
Dexter was cut off by the door opening to the kitchen an their angry mother standing there.
"Oh! Hello, mother!" The nice Dexter said. "What do you need of us?"
She escorted the two into the kitchen, where a giant mess was made.
"Now i'm going to go get a bar of soap to wash out your filthy little mouths, and when I come back I want to see this place spotless!" The mother yelled before she slammed the door.
The nice pair turned around to see a kitchen filled with carnage and destruction reminiscents.
"Oh my!" They both exclaimed. "Well, Dee Dee, we best get to work!" The nice Dexter finished.
There was a shaking and a loud explosion coming from upstairs.
"It seems our counterparts are involved in some sort of mischief upstairs! We should come to their aid wouldn't you say?" The nice Dexter asked.
"Why yes, but what of the cleaning, dear brother?" The nice Dee Dee continued.
"Hmm. I've got it! And it's a pip of an idea, too! We'll leave a note!" The nice Dexter said, as they rushed off.
They both looked at a note they wrote that they hung on the fridge. It read:
'Dearest Mother, We shall return momentarily, went to help out evil counterparts. Dexter and Dee Dee.'
"Ah, yes. Come dear sister!" The nice Dexter said as they ran off.
[View pans to lab]
The evil Dexter shot a piece of equipment with a blaster as they both laughed. Dee Dee took a canister of liquid in her hands and broke it on the floor.
"Excuse me sir, madam, but you must stop this senseless distruction now!" The nice Dexter stated. The nice Dee Dee waved her finger, before Dexter went on. "...please."
A laser hit the wall behind the nice Dexter as they ducked. They both yelled. Another few lasers blasted from the rude Dexter's gun as they ran behind a wall.
"Phew!" They both breathed.
"Let me play with that!" The rude Dee Dee yelled at the rude Dexter.
"You're too stupid to use it, you moron!" The rude Dexter yelled as he hit the rude Dee Dee over the head with the launcher.
"Gosh, Dee Dee. I have an idea!" The nice Dexter said to the nice Dee Dee. "Well, its a little bit bloom."
"Bloom? Well, let's hear it anyways!" The nice Dee Dee said to the nice Dexter.
The nice Dexter whispered in her ear before she gasped and held her hand over her mouth.
"Oh my, Dexter, that is deceptive!" The nice Dee Dee giggled.
They got into their positions, the nice Dee Dee behind the tube for the rude copies at the rude removal system, and Dexter to another spot. The nice Dee Dee gave the signal, and so did Dexter.
"Oh, I hope nobody goes into the rude removal system, where they could possibly duplicate themselves some more and there could be millions of rude fellows running around!" The nice Dexter yelled.
"Yeah!" The rude pair yelled before running into the chamber.
The nice Dexter used the motherboard for a few moments before running into the other chamber along with the nice Dee Dee.
'Rude removal system reverse activated.' The machine chimed as the gas from the tube the rude pair was in traveled to the other tube, leaving the rude pair dissapeared.
'Sequence complete.' The system chimed, as Dexter and Dee Dee's normal selves walked out of the tube.
"Phew. Glad that's over." Dexter complained. "No thanks to you." He said, back in his normal accent.
"Me? I'm not the one who built the stupid thing!" Dee Dee replied.
"But I built it to remove your rudeness!" Dexter snapped back.
"I'm not rude, you are!" Dee Dee argued. "No, you." Dexter calmly replied.
[View goes to Dexter's bedroom]
"For the last time, it is you who is rude, you big- aah!" Dexter was interrupted as their mother stood in the doorway of the room, holding a bar of soap.
She tossed the soap into the air, and grabbed it when it fell.
"Now to clean those filthy mouths." She stated.
[The camera zoomed in on Dexter's face and he looks at the viewers]
"Oh, stuff." He said.
~The End~
