The Life and Death of Mr. Nappy - Feels like yesterday

[Jokey365]

Everything faded in from black, slowly going from a big mess of color to a clear view of the room. I was upside down, hanging from a wooden beam on the ceiling. My hands were tied together, and I was hanging by my tied ankles. There was a small puddle of blood on the concrete floor below me, which means I must have been violently pulled down here. By the looks of things I was in a basement, and the only light was coming from a small window with some newspaper over it. There was a table in the side of the room with what looked like a radio on it. A note was stuck to the top, but I couldn't read it from my current position. A staircase in the corner lead up to what I assumed was a door. Other than the table, the room seemed empty.
What the hell was I going to do?

[Ad Bot]

[-Maxx-]

attempt to stuff yourself so hard that it launches you out of the ties.

[Nonnel]

attempt to stuff yourself so hard that it launches you out of the ties.

Try and move back and forth to break the wooden beam

[Jokey365]

Try and move back and forth to break the wooden beam

To avoid possible head trauma, I grab my legs and pull myself up into a C shape. I begin to swing myself backwards and frontwards, and after a bit of swinging, the beam breaks. Not how I would expect it to break anyways. The bit with the rope tied to it breaks away from the rest of the beams. I land on my back, and the previously described beam I broke away hits me square in the face. I stand up, my back now wet with the blood puddle I landed in. My hands and ankles are still tied, but now my ankles have a piece of a wooden beam dragging along behind them.

[Jokey365]

bumpwafjflwng

The only available object to my interest right now was the radio. I was now able to read the note, and it read; 'note to self: fix radio'. I turned the radio around and pulled the back off. It was a mess of tangled wires and things where they shouldn't be. After a long sigh and pondering who would be stupid enough to not see this, I tried my hardest to untangle some of the wires and put all of them back in their place. I switched the radio on, only to be greeted by static. The thing wasn't even on any station or anything. I reached for the knob to adjust the radio, but I just poked the front of the radio itself. The knob was missing. For crying out loud, whoever owns this thing has a hard time of seeing the obvious. My final solution was to punch the side of it. The static changed volume and pitch rapidly for a second, then stopped abruptly. Did I break it? Even if I did, the idiot who owns the radio doesn't deserve it fixed anyways.
"You need to get out of there." a familiar sounding voice suddenly said. It came from the radio.
"Who is this?" I asked, confused.
"There's a knife in a cardboard box in the corner. Feel around, don't cut yourself." the voice said, ignoring me. He must not be able to hear me.
I looked into the dark corner, and slowly with caution, I walked over to it. I kicked a cardboard box. I bent over and reached down inside, cutting myself on a sharp object. After trying again, I pulled out a knife and returned to the table.
It took a second, but I got my hands free, then freed my ankles.
"Now for the three options, and you better make a choice quick, you're running out of time." the voice said.
"The building you're in is on fire."

[grunterdb1951]

Find a gas powered stick before throwing a blanket over the fire.

[grunterdb1951]

In all seriousness, ask what these three options are.

[Jokey365]

"Your three options are as followed; out the window, up the stairs and out the back door, or to the top floor. The last option may seem like the foolish one, but it's probably your best. Going out the window will put you in an alley outside, where multiple citizens and cops can see you. The back door will keep you on the scene, and there's a helicopter outside. Running is your only chance from there. Your final option, to the top floor, will get you coated in soot and other assorted cuts and bruises. A fireman is about to get lifted to the top of the building to check for any survivors, as the top floor is not completely engulfed yet. The closer to the middle of the building, the more fire you have. Once the fireman finds you, he'll help you out, and due to your new soot suit, nobody will recognize you. Make your choice now, the ceiling is about to collapse."
Where the hell do I go?

[grunterdb1951]

Up those stairs baby.

[Jokey365]

Up those stairs baby.

I scurried up the stairs and out the door, into the very brightly lit kitchen, only it was lit up by fire. As expected, I hear the floor collapse, crushing multiple things within the basement. I run over to the stairs that would lead me further up, only to find them almost completely engulfed in flames. I guess the middle came sooner than expected. "So much for the fireman!" I shout before making a dash for the back door. With my shoulder I bust the door open and fall out onto the grass in the backyard, coughing up a lot more smoke than I would have thought I inhaled. A helicopter was above as the voice had said, and people were screaming and sirens were blaring out front.
Next I was ordered to run, but my only option was over a fence and onwards or out onto the street.

[Nonnel]

[Jokey365]

I threw myself over the fence, into another backyard. This backyard was two in one, two houses taking it up. I ran between the two houses and onto the sidewalk. I turned around and examined the giant smoke cloud that was pouring out of the building. Everyone was busy at the house, so it was smooth sailing for me from here. There was an empty car nearby and multiple houses down the road that lead up into a semi-busy road. In my other direction was a road that lead up a hill to a dead end, a road that went to the house I had just exited, and a road that went off to a whole lot of nowhere.

[Nonnel]

Steal the car.

[Jokey365]

I wasn't planning on running more than I already had today, which seemed like a good twenty feet. Either way, the car was a good transportation option as of right now. I wasn't a pro in the vehicle theft department, so my first instinct was to see if the car was unlocked. No dice. Well I ran out of options quick. My second instinct was to kick the car and hope the door popped open. One sickening 'CRACK' later and the car had a foot sized dent in it.
"HEY! WHAT ARE YOU DOIN' TO ME CAR?!" a man shouted as he approached me.

[Alex Man!]

Molest the man, slam his face into the window until it breaks. Eat the body as a snack, keep leftovers in the back seat.