I feel like my life is spiraling downward at a constant speed because whenever I open up word, words don't flow through my head anymore like they used to. I've been working constantly — almost every day, and I've had hardly any time to myself. I feel pretty dead almost every day I wake up now because I'm so exhausted from working so much. Today I went to work while sick, like many other times, and had to fight through it to help keep my good attendance. I don't know what's been causing my thoughts to be so clouded but I'm thinking that it's the fact that I've been getting up for work constantly on only 7-8 hours of sleep and I'm not a very good morning person.
I'm starting to get really depressed and I'm starting to get the feeling of a zombie because of my daily cycles. It's weird to me because it's my first job but I refuse to stay home sick. Work's been getting easier for the past three months I've been working, but it's wearing me out and I've got school coming up in August. The new school I'm going to (which is online) requires me to drive to their building twice a week and work in the building. I get my license in September and I need to purchase a car as soon as possible so I won't have to rely on getting rides, so I'm working my ass off the entire summer at McDonald's and it's miserable.
When school starts again, I'm gonna have to work a job and go to school (mostly at home) so that will give me some relief because I won't be able to work prior to 4PM again during the school year. But it's going to be tough because I'm planning to be serious about school this year so I probably won't even get a moment's free-time anymore.
Anyway, main point here is: All this stuff is making it hard for me to think, I'm getting depressed, and I can't even think clearly enough to write poetry anymore.
It sucks because I want to write my girlfriend some more poetry but I can't and I feel really bad for it.
:C
