Author Topic: Give me things to voice over  (Read 1962 times)

Give me something to read off of, and I will record myself saying it.
Sounds simple enough? Good. Post away

also I use the default Sound Recorder program then upload in audioboo.fm
EPISODE 1: SCOOBY DOO GETS loveY
https://audioboo.fm/boos/1622494-zoinks
EPISODE 2: PARENTAL MONOLOGUE
https://audioboo.fm/boos/1622502-episode-2-parental-monologue
EPISODE 3: DONT forget WITH ME
https://audioboo.fm/boos/1622534-episode-3-dont-forget-with-me
EPISODE 4: WOODY GOT WOOD
https://audioboo.fm/boos/1622538-episode-4-woody-got-wood
EPISODE 5: THE SNOWMAN
https://audioboo.fm/boos/1622540-episode-5-the-snowman
EPISODE 6: THE FURY OF THE SEALS
https://audioboo.fm/boos/1622542-episode-6-the-fury-of-the-seals
EPISODE 7: 9/11 IS A LIE
https://audioboo.fm/boos/1622545-episode-7-9-11-is-a-lie
« Last Edit: September 25, 2013, 07:21:56 PM by Becquerel »



"It occurs to me that once you become a parent, all children are slightly more interesting. Whereas previously I recoiled in horror when a small child stumbled towards me, a glob of spittle dangling provacatively from it’s lips, it’s hands a gloss with jamminess. Now I give each child I see a knowing smile.
I know now that the reason I do this is that in every child I see a bit of my son. Him when he’s eight kicking a ball in the park. Him at two babbling incomprehensible, him when he was a new born, all pink and wriggly and helpless."





What the forget did you just loving say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the forget out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my loving words. You think you can get away with saying that stuff to me over the Internet? Think again, forgeter. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re loving dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little stuff. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your loving tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will stuff fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re loving dead, kiddo.

Read this:
HI, I'M GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND CEO OF THE MEN'S WEARHOUSE. 9/11 WAS A LIE. THERE WERE NO TOWEL HEADS. THERE WAS NO AIRPLANE. IN TRUTH I WAS VISITING THE BIG APPLE, SO AS TO COMPARE MY GARGANTUAN MEAT TRAIN TO IT AND LAUGH AT THE GASPING NEW YORKERS AS I POUNDED THEIR BELOVED NAMESAKE INTO BIG APPLE SAUCE. HAVING NOT GOTTEN RELEASE FROM MY CULINARY EXERCISE, I MEANDERED DOWN THE STREET WITH MY VITAL BLOOD ENGORGED SEWER PIPE OUT IN FRONT OF ME LIKE A BLIND MAN'S CANE, LOOKING FOR A HOLE IN THE BACKSIDE OF A WOMAN WHICH I WOULD STRETCH BEYOND HUMAN LIMITS. I SPOTTED AT THAT VERY MOMENT AN ATTRACTIVE FEMALE IN A MINISKIRT WAVING AT ME. I SLAPPED HER TO THE GROUND WITH MY ENORMOUS PHALLUS AND QUICKLY RAVISHED HER SKIRT LIKE A STARVED DOG ON A BABY MADE OF STEAK. THE SIGHT THAT AWAITED BOTH SHOCKED AND ENRAGED ME. AFTER SEEING THIS "WOMAN'S" RAISIN-SIZED WINKY WINKLER, I VOMITED DOWN HIS THROAT AND PENETRATED HIS ESOPHAGUS, RIPPED OUT HIS SPINE AND PEELED HIS CORPSE FROM MY MONEYMAKER. TO TEACH ALL OF NEW YORK A LESSON FOR LETTING THIS FLAMING cigarette BAG LIVE, I LET LOOSE A SEMENAL FLOOD OF BIBLICAL PROPORTIONS UPON THE TOWERS OF TWO (AT WHOM'S SMALL SIZE I LAUGHED LIKE A CLOWN RAPING AN 8 YEAR OLD), WHICH CAUSED THEM TO COME CRASHING DOWN LIKE ME AFTER A WEEKEND METH BINGE. I MOCKED THE NEW YORKERS AND MADE monday JOKES AS THEY RAN FROM MY EVER EXPANDING CLOUD OF SPERMAZOA, MASTURBATING TO THE LOOKS OF HORROR ON THEIR FACES. THE GOVERNMENT, IN AN ATTEMPT TO SAVE FACE AND BECAUSE THEY HATE ARABS MORE THAN JEWS, PAINTED A BOEING 767 ON MY GIGANTIC rooster AND CALLED IT A TERRORIST ATTACK. THE FEELING OF PAINTBRUSHES ON MY richard MADE ME COME AGAIN, AND PRESIDENT BUSH SNORTED UP EVERY LAST DROP BECAUSE HE THOUGHT IT WAS COKE. I GUARANTEE IT.


"It occurs to me that once you become a parent, all children are slightly more interesting. Whereas previously I recoiled in horror when a small child stumbled towards me, a glob of spittle dangling provacatively from it’s lips, it’s hands a gloss with jamminess. Now I give each child I see a knowing smile.
I know now that the reason I do this is that in every child I see a bit of my son. Him when he’s eight kicking a ball in the park. Him at two babbling incomprehensible, him when he was a new born, all pink and wriggly and helpless."
https://audioboo.fm/boos/1622502-episode-2-parental-monologue

Eh screw it. If you want a custom tailored recording then pm me and ill do it
« Last Edit: September 25, 2013, 07:25:20 PM by Becquerel »