Before, I was the reason misanthropy was ever thought of. I couldn't design anything AWESOME or HIP for my job and I was fired! My wife left me and I was alone. In the caverns of my apartment I had consumed many a bottle of alcohol and many a bottle of pillage. I looked at myself into the mirror and contemplated. I sported a bland white shirt, blue jeans, and muddled hair. And then upon my blue and white screen flashed Creative Unleashed™ and I saw its expansive vault of creativity and tips! Not only was I rehired by my old job and remarried to my old wife, but it was I WHO LEFT THEM INSTEAD! I looked at myself in the mirror again, this time around in my gold limo, and saw a sporty young creative kid! Now, I'm the life of the party, and an asset of the media! If I were you, bland and hideous, I would totally suggest investing in Creative Unleashed™, and unleashing your creativity!
What is this?!