Today was an interesting day at work. For those of you who don’t know, I work in a prestigious golf club as a cook. Today started like a normal day, there was a birthday party going on, so I was working late.
The party guests started arriving, most of them middle aged richardwads who have more money than brains. So this one guy comes into the kitchen at around 9pm, asking my manager for £100, they had a small argument and I kept out of it, making myself occupied with other things. About an hour later, I was on a cigarette break outside, when the manager comes bouncing out of the kitchen door and with a straight face, looks me in the eyes and says “Get in, we need to go and buy prostitutes.”
I get in his car and we speed down to town, on the way there he hands me his credit card and tells me his pin number. As the town has a big one way system, I hopped out by the bank and withdrew £100 and he picked me back up. We sped back to the golf club, where I continued to work giggling to myself that soon there were to be some dirty whores in my workplace.
About an hour and a half later this woman comes in and starts stripping in front of everyone. She takes off her thong and puts it into the guys mouth, suddenly my brain screams “GONORRHEA!” She ends up completely naked riding on this guys lap and everyone is cheering and laughing. I’m of course standing at the back of the room laughing my ass off and snapchatting my friends.
The pretentious ballbags get so drunk that they order 12 of our finest champagne and two bottles of tequila.
Pretty crazy night at work!