Are my expected standards too high?

Author Topic: Are my expected standards too high?  (Read 1064 times)

Title...

I am once again having issues with my parents expecting way too much from me in terms of academics, my mom in particular. In June, I took the ACT and got a 27. They didn't think it was good enough and told me to take it again to get the science and math portions higher. I did, but lost points on what I had gotten high before and came around with another 27. My mom is furious now saying that I never study in school and that I don't get enough homework.

As you can see from the attached screenshots, that is either a) the most illogical thing that can be said in this situation or b) she really thinks that those percentages are not good.

I'm used to this to a point. The last time my mom found out I got a B in one of my in-class 10pt assignments (Spanish II), she was pissed for two days and argued for an hour straight after the incident. Getting As isn't that hard for me (being matter of fact, no intended bragging), but a once in a while slide to a B doesn't seem too unreasonable.

I'm honestly lucky to get good grades like you do.

I'd have to say your mom's standards are way too high, but just believe that getting good grades for the most part does help you in the future.

I'm honestly lucky to get good grades like you do.

I'd have to say your mom's standards are way too high, but just believe that getting good grades for the most part does help you in the future.

Oh definitely, and I'm not going to stop. I just want her to get off of my back about this stuff.

Tell her that she is being ridiculous and that not everyone's brains work the same way.

I guess she didn't take any sort of psychology class ever.

Tell her that she is being ridiculous and that not everyone's brains work the same way.

I guess she didn't take any sort of psychology class ever.

She got her Associate's in psychology lol

She got her Associate's in psychology lol
Then how does she not understand that not everyone's brains are wired for doing perfect on a test that has no bearing on your life whatsoever apart from college acceptance?  Does she seriously not understand that maybe a 27 is the best that you can manage?

HA
you have infinite campus too

I'd think you're grades are fine...
She got her Associate's in psychology lol
lol

I have a somewhat similar thing with my mom, in that she thinks me working past dinner on school (homeschooled) is perfectly fine (I'd agree), but that I have it rather easy since she thinks most kids my age would have many hours of homework when they get back from school.

 Is it true that homework takes you guys that long?

Grades aren't everything. Most importantly, you'll learn this for yourself in time.

Put effort into your studies (which it sounds like you're doing), and make sure you dedicate time to things that aren't studies that interest you, that you are passionate for, and that will help you develop skills you'll be glad to have in the workforce.

Best way I can explain this, in an effort to alleviate some clear stress about your situation, is to give a few examples from my last few years in school:

I've never done great in school—not badly, but not great. Certainly not good enough to get into a school like University of Southern California on my grades alone. However, I took it upon myself to cultivate longstanding participation with a number of projects that I had a passion for, and developed a few enterprises of my own. Namely, 10+ years on and off stage in live theater. This has given me skills in communication, public speaking, and overall confidence that I never would have acquired from hitting the books and getting a 30 on the ACT. I produced and hosted my own radio show on a real station for over a year. This applied my passion for technology to a real industry that led to the best job I've ever had as a producer for Entercom communications. Also provided a great avenue for applying my theater skills through voice acting for the show.

Bottom line is, work hard in school—but work harder to understand what will personally benefit you most in the long run. For me, doing just well enough in school to supplement my numerous activities set me up to take my passions to a more professional level. Most importantly, all my activities carried a huge amount of longevity. I didn't just try theater once, I dedicated year after year to it. That's what makes the difference.

Don't stress too hard, and really don't let your parents get you down. You're (academically) doing a great job. Your efforts will pay off in time—even if it doesn't seem that way now. Keep up the great work, keep your standards high, and focus on better yourself FOR yourself. Not for your parents.


Is it true that homework takes you guys that long?

Nope. I usually can get homework done at the school (even college credit work) before I even go home.



Academics are really everything I do. I don't really do anything outside or even inside school (apologetics and robotics,  that's all) mainly because my interests are not practical or too expensive. Because of this, I can donate so much more time for academics so I'm usually the class leader in terms of grades.

And I probably went a little hard on the whole situation. My parents aren't really in my way in any manner. They can just be an annoyance. My 27 is good enough to get into the college I want to enroll in (St. Louis University), but good enough shouldn't just be the cutoff.

but good enough shouldn't just be the cutoff.

Good mindset. You're doing fine, man. Parents are an annoyance for everyone. Best of luck!

Parents expect too much out of wanting their kids to either live up to their level, or exceed where they couldn't.

Do your best to not take it personally.

Roll with it. I'd rather have parents that devoted their life to trying to make me a better person than ones that slacked off and were hardly ever involved in my life.