My driving test was nothing short of powerful amusement.
It was on my 18th birthday and I was the very last person to take the test (almost didn't get to take it, since the place was closing for the day). I got a grouchy cop woman for an instructor. I had also never driven the 3-ton 18ft long new van that my dad had gotten the week before. Imagine driving a shuttle bus for your driving test.
Incidents:
I successfully distracted her for a precious second while my eyes hunted for the window defroster. She had just told me to push in the e-brake and told me to do the defroster, which was in a different place than our previous van. My mind went, "Oh crud oh crud". I quickly asked her, "Uh do you want me to release the brake?" while I hunted for it. I found it on a dial near the steering wheel and flicked it on when she looked down at the brake. She never noticed lol
While we were passing through a neighborhood, she wanted me to drive in reverse down the street while watching for cars. The divided rear window on the van is practically useless being so far away and being five feet off the ground, so I was looking over my left shoulder for maximum visibility. She started getting pissed and demanding that I look out the rear window. I told her that I can't see as much by doing that, and ended up driving almost blindly in reverse down the street, using light poles and trees along the side to make sure I didn't get too close to a curb. She deducted points for not using the back window from the start.
As I was leaving the neighborhood, I came out to a frontage road alongside I-255. I saw a truck that was a good 1/8 mile away so I went ahead and turned right. I accelerated smoothly and not too fast, but she still said that I should've waited for the truck, which was still a good football field distance behind me after I hit the speed limit.
On that same road at the end, there was a stop sign that came to a four lane road that went under the interstate. I came to a complete stop at the stop sign and realized that I couldn't see far enough down the road to safely turn. I pulled forward towards the intersection and slowed (but didn't stop entirely), waited for a truck to pass, and then continued. She said that I didn't completely stop.
She told me to head back to the DMV building and I figured I was done. I was actually quite relieved. I entered the parking lot...only to have her direct me towards some cones set up in a parallel parking manner. She told me to park between the cones which were only set up for a conventional sized sedan to park comfortably between them (probably 20ft or so). I had never parallel parked at all, not even in a normal sized car. I pulled in front of the cones and backed in, using my shoulder view and fake glances out the back window trying to figure out when to stop. I snuck glances up at the backup camera on the rearview mirror and parked perfectly with under a foot of clearance from either bumper. I seriously wanted to yell something along the lines of, "HA REKT!!"
I passed.
