was downtown with a friend once, ate a lot of food,
went to do the marjuna,
had to defecate,
couldn't find anywhere to defecate,
stuck looking for a place to defecate while our bowels are in the equal amounts of extreme pain,
we are both walking identically in the form of a penguin,
if we don't it'll come out,
go to friends house to poop,
friend says is at house,
friend turns out not at house,
friend makes us wait 30 min on his porch,
reveals he can't let us inside,
walk to nearby park,
see porta potty 400ft. away from us on other side of field,
waddle across field,
it pops out a bit,
suck it back in,
get to porta potty, it's loving terribly disgusting
can't even tell what that is on the floor,
try to clean toilet seat,
forget that it's about to literally burst from within,
levitate my ass above the seat but close enough to not warrant a splash,
splash,
forget,
clean splash nasties,
me and friend exit the porta potty at identical times,
face of relief,
did more marjurnurn,
good day