Am I the only one who does everything by myself? And I mean, everything. I go on vacation by myself, homeschooled myself, graduated myself, got college setup by myself, make all my own meals, buy almost all of my own food, go to movies by myself, go on vacation to myself, don't go to parties, don't hang out with friends, I workout by myself, I game by myself, I drive everywhere by myself.
It's good. But it also loving sucks. I don't trust anyone in the slightest. If anyone invites me anywhere, I don't think it's because they like me. I avoid hanging out with people by blowing them off, then feel sorry for myself like I don't have any friends, even though it's my own fault.
Speaking of vacation by myself -- I'm going to Japan for a month... by myself. Big surprise there, huh. Maybe I can meet some more people there. It's nice to be in a strange place where no one knows who you are.
I'm 17 and I'm already living life like a retired old man whose family has already died long ago. Feels stuffty to be so alone and self-dependent all the time, while sometimes it can be peaceful.