Not too long ago, I used to ponder what the forget was wrong with me. Nothing in my life really felt real; it was like a depersonalization. Like I was living in purgatory, slowly descending more into hell with every passing week. Enough of that edgy stuff.
I've always had confidence issues, so I was lonely. Maybe the depersonalization wasn't such a bad thing. Nothing felt real, so I just said forget it and did whatever without a sense of my mind holding me back on anything. Suddenly more people were interested in talking to me. I'm not sure why, but I gained my sense of being. Maybe the change in my lifestyle had an influence on it, I don't know.
I starting hanging out with more people outside of school. I didn't really feel shy anymore because I basically did whatever during my depersonalization, and they accepted whatever I did then. I finally got off the computer for more than a week. The last time I did that was literally 3 years ago when my PC took a stuff.
My psychologist says it's a good conflict resolution technique to write about your life as if you're writing someone, so I felt sort of obligated to give some sort of update of my situation (though most of you won't care). I might not be on as often, and some of you will appreciate that. No hate needed, just love.
