divorce and cut all contact with my wife so the kids grow up with a fractured, dysfunctional family, instilling emotional instability in them around big holidays and birthdays and discomfort around actual happy families such as those of their friends or strangers in public. i will do my hardest to make things worse. when they are all adults and can't take the bottled up feelings anymore - haunted by the trauma of their childhood - they'll confront me as a group with their hatred. i'll tell them "it's just a prank"
