Author Topic: MEMO: Human Resources reform; forum demerit system effective immediately  (Read 1605 times)


TO:Staff
FROM:Debbie Johnson, Human Resources
SUBJECT:Human Resources reform; forum demerit system effective immediately
DATE:October 24, 2017



Hi, all. First I'd like to congratulate everyone on an excellent fiscal year thus far. The result of this is that there is a surplus of funds in the company which can go towards bettering our inter-staff relations. For this reason, after testimony from a few regional HR department leaders such as myself, the higher-ups have decided to put part of the surplus funds into Human Resources.

Hopefully you've all had a chance to meet our new trainees, Mark R. and Adam H. They have been learning the ropes in the day-to-day of HR at our branch for the past two weeks now. If you haven't introduced yourself, make sure you do it soon, otherwise face two demerits. The demerit system is introduced below.

The reason I've sent out this memo is because of an incident last week in which an employee used inappropriate racial slurs in reference to a coworker. This was overheard by David Weiss in Sales who reported it in the HR Incident Dropbox, and who has asked to remain anonymous. It has come to our attention that this is not an isolated incident. The new trainees have both reported to me overhearing negative references to their Mexican and Jewish heritages, respectively. They have also asked that their identities remain anonymous.

Because of these incidents, Corporate will be sending down a couple of their HR workers to our branch to hold a racial sensitivity seminar in conjunction with our own HR department this Thursday at 2:00pm. Schedule accordingly. For now, let it be known that bigotry will not be allowed in our workplace!

The incidents also mean that we'll be cracking down on this inappropriate behavior. For this reason, the higher-ups have suggested we implement a demerit system. The system will revolve around the number of incidents any employee is a part of, and the severity of those incidents. A partial list of actions which necessitate demerits is listed in the attached document. 50 demerits in one quarter will result in dismissal of the offending employee pending review from the regional manager.

Along with demerits will be merits. Merits will be awarded to employees when they report the inappropriate behavior of another employee, as well as on a case-to-case basis of good deeds toward the company. Merits do not cancel out demerits but will work separately. An acceptable report of inappropriate behavior will earn the reporter 5 merits, give or take for the severity of the behavior. An employee who has accrued 50 merits over a quarter will be thrown a one hour ice cream sandwich party on the last Friday of the quarter. Each employee will be entitled to 1 (one) ice cream sandwich, given that they have not received any demerits in the last period.

Hopefully everyone will agree that this is what's best for the company as well as all of us here. Please feel free to give feedback on this plan, especially regarding anything we may have overlooked.

Thank you,



Debbie F. Johnson, Human Resources
49 N Union St
Pawtucket, RI 02860

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this is unfair, you know I just can't stop being tribal so this basically means you're firing me

what the forget am I looking at

wait if they're supposed to be anonymous why did you mention them all by name

They've asked to remain ah nonymous.

Understandable, have a nice day

wait why is killing a co-worker punished by 49 demerits instead of being fired im confused

wait why is killing a co-worker punished by 49 demerits instead of being fired im confused
well obviously killing a client is much worse than a co worker, and we understand they can be handicaps sometimes so you can just about get off with it

Human resources
for people, by robots.


"This was overheard by David Weiss in Sales who reported it in the HR Incident Dropbox, and who has asked to remain anonymous"
well you sure forgeted up that anonymity huh