Author Topic: Rate my webcomic's plot  (Read 1028 times)

« Last Edit: March 01, 2018, 02:18:37 PM by cromartini »


this plot is outstanding; i cried when the character Google said "You need permission"


Not quite a plot, not quite a premise, hardly scenario, just half a setting. Maybe if story progression be had, it might not be static and not quite so bad. It has a few holes like when, where or why, but take a few steps—Never by shy. But don't be disheartened or worry about it.

Okay silly poem bs aside, you need to answer a lot of whys—what makes people friends and others enemies. What motivates them?

Next, it seems to be only a setting for a story, and sorely misses characters which readers can follow, and any sort of goal those characters have to say what the readers should hope for. You need something to pull readers.

Not quite a plot, not quite a premise, hardly scenario, just half a setting. Maybe if story progression be had, it might not be static and not quite so bad. It has a few holes like when, where or why, but take a few steps—Never by shy. But don't be disheartened or worry about it.

Okay silly poem bs aside, you need to answer a lot of whys—what makes people friends and others enemies. What motivates them?

Next, it seems to be only a setting for a story, and sorely misses characters which readers can follow, and any sort of goal those characters have to say what the readers should hope for. You need something to pull readers.
I made that like very late and here is the general gist of things.

Peacemakers are moronic ork-spacmarine hybrids. They were engineerd by an ancient race to tame the wild galaxy and later rebelled against them for many reasons, amongst them being how a branch of the peacemakers actualy liked war and wanted it to continiue (They got absolutely destroyed), the purists who followed a part of the ancient race (they lost), and the rebels who wanted to protect their slightly geneticaly deficient brethren (Deficiensies include: Severe retardation, general incompotence, being a female, etc), and they were led by another part of the ancients race which were kinda like the millenials, absolutely stupid and young. The peacemakers are split into generations so for an instance, Gen 1 are a bunch of clone trooper rip-offs with good gear, gen 2 are the same but with better gear, 2.5 are the deficient ones, gen 3 are agile, gen 4 is tanky and gen 5 is a mix of gen 3 and 4.

The federacy (Might change the name later) is the european union, star trek federation and the covenant combined in one. They have all the planet of the hat trope aliens, from the high and mighty french generals esque aliens, to the smallest of grunts, from the cultured musical aliens to the unculutred brutes. They are the guys with the cool uniform-armor, laser guns and fukkin teleporters. They are the

The CHC is like the generic human colonies thingy. Think of the starship troopers from the movies or the UNSC. All human colonies serve as states to the CHC, with the center of it being Earth. The CHC uses mostly primitive technology in the eyes of the federacy, and the technology that won't explode in your face in the case of the peacemakers. The CHC's military is simmilar to that of the IG or the starship troopers, except the CHC uses actual military tactics.

hmmm draw me a peacemaker