Sorry if it seems like I'm Mr. Important Pants by posting all of this too... there's a really good feeling that comes with coming clean that I'm unsure is selfish or not. I am also refreshing this page manically so that's a sign that I'm doing it for myself if anything, I don't intend to be all noble or whatever, I just want to fix this crappy behavior for good no matter the consequences. So help if you want but I really just want to be done with being a stuffty person.