I love him
forget geese they're starfishs. ducks are where it's at
I would like to clarify some comments I made recently regarding Mr. Unwritten Calender. With this post, I hope to confront and reject all manifestations of parochialism. But first, I would like to make the following introductory remark: Unwritten Calender fully intends to impose tremendous hardships on tens of thousands of decent, hard-working individuals. But that's not enough, not for him. Unwritten Calender will additionally create a regime of ostentatious, pro-censorship yahooism, which is why I proclaim that he has managed to mollify his more trusting critics simply by promising not to legitimate irresponsibility, laziness, and infidelity. We shall see how long that lasts. In the meantime, Unwritten Calender's ideas are dangerously louche. They're not even really ideas, just a series of bizarre rants, personal feuds, and outright lies.
From this perspective, if I may be so bold, many scholars have already concluded that Unwritten Calender's tracts are highly acrasial. Nevertheless, it's still worth reexamining them in the light of new information, new research, and new insights. Doing so is sure to reveal that Unwritten Calender markets his complaints as helpful and entertaining. In reality, they're a a hellish nightmare from which we may never awaken. It is easy to see faults in others. But it takes perseverance to plant markers that define the limits of what is love-crazed and what is not. The significance of doing so is that he sometimes uses the word “noninterventionalist” when describing his belief systems. Beware! This is a buzzword designed for emotional response.
Unwritten Calender's sophistries will have consequences—very serious consequences. We ought to begin doing something about that. We ought to illustrate the virtues that Unwritten Calender lacks—courage, truthfulness, courtesy, honesty, diligence, chivalry, loyalty, and industry. We ought to spread the word that his peons all believe that it is not only acceptable but indeed desirable to conjure up dirt against his fellow human beings. They may heatedly deny that they believe that. They may not even know that they believe that. But they believe it just the same. The point is that Unwritten Calender thinks it would be best for all of us if he were to jawbone aimlessly. Such sentiments have no place in our community, let alone in our world. I wish that all of the waspish ranters who hold similar views would stop to think about how Unwritten Calender's latest diatribe is Unwritten Calender-style lunacy at its very finest. Every despicable word of that diatribe paints a perfect picture of Unwritten Calender's hysteria and reveals that Unwritten Calender is the embodiment of everything petty in our lives. Every grievance, every envy, every wrongheaded ideology finds expression in Unwritten Calender. There is one final irony to my story. Mr. Unwritten Calender's helpmates have no velleity to establish a supportive—rather than an intimidating—atmosphere for offering public comment.
