Near Death Experiences

[Daffy]

Jesus loves me this I know,
for the Bible tells me so!
But scientists disagree.

Bioshock reference

[Ad Bot]

[Chrono]

I don't recall ever having a near death experience. However, I've had a moment of slow motion before. It happened as I jumped off something, it was epic.

[Tokthree]

I almost choked to death on bacon.....

Luckily I was eating in the same room as my parents.....

I still love bacon :V

[Tom]

I almost choked to death on bacon.....

Luckily I was eating in the same room as my parents.....

I still love bacon :V

lol me too

[Robo Noob]

I've broken a few bones, not really anything that bad. One time I was riding my bike down my street, and on my left there was a little dog barking at me. I turned to look at the mutt and when I turned back I was about 2 inches from a black mailbox marked "607" in gold letters. I flew off my bike and landed with my hand twisted under my back (no I didn't do a front flip, I spinned trying to save myself lol) and I had a lot of scratches and scrapes on my fingers and the back of my hand along with a broken ring finger.  I also broke that same finger earlier in my life (around 6) when searching for salamanders under rocks in my neighbor's yard. I lifted up this huge rock (didn't even see a salamander in this experience D:) and the weight became so much that I dropped it. Apparently to the back of the rock there was another smaller rock, you can guess what happened. My finger got wedged between the two rocks and I started crying/screaming. By the tme I got it out it was bulbus and red, so I ran to my house. My dad gave me some motrin, which nearly instantly put me to sleep. I went outside and my brother and friends were playing "Soul Calibur" with wiffle ball bats and various other 'swords'. So when I walked over to see what he forget these fools were doing my brother was spinning around with the bat, and guess where it hit me! Directly on my finger that I just broke! Ran back inside crying and my dad just sighed and drugged me again. Another time it was my brother's 11th birthday (he's always been somewhat fat and larger than me) and he was playing bowling with me and his friend in the arcade. It was his friend's turn but my brother kept playing and tripped his tall ass friend who fell on me and I bashed my head on the corner of the coin machine. It barely hurt at all, the bad part was when I felt my head and my hand was covered in blood. I ran through the bar screaming and my mom and a waitress came and got me. They took me into the woman's restroom and covered my head with a makeshift icepack. When I was leaving with the paramedics my brother was still playing bowling (probably playing on my turns). Anyways, I ended up with 3 staples in the back of my head. Last time I went to the hospital was around a month and a half ago, where I woke up and had a headache. No this was not just any headache, it was the worst headache in history. Worse than the baddest migraine you've ever expirienced. I was twitching due to low electrolytes and could barely walk/breathe/talk. So I was in the hospital and they set me up on IV and I was talking to the doctor and mentioned a tick I had gotten two weeks earlier... on my snake. He quickly closes the curtains in my room and forces me to whip out my richard. There was no bite on it, but he kept going. He just stood there and grabbed my wanker and told me to turn my head and cough and he diagnosed me with lymes disease. About a week later the results came back negative for lymes disease, apparently my blood is quite healthy just I had low electrolytes and some other weird stuff. At least this expirience got me out of school for a week, too bad it landed me a 27 in math for the Marking Period.

Oh my richard that's long

[Saxophone]

They took me into the woman's restroom...

Women...

[Eryehk]

Mine would be a tl;dr situation.
In short, the most major near death situations - Two dogbites across my face that were almost into the bone/eyes. One around when I was two, the other when I was eleven-ish.

[Robo Noob]

Women...

Fair enough. I was/am tired; going to bed now.

[Godik7]

Fair enough. I was/am tired; going to bed now.

Jesus Christ man!
Giant wall of text.
I'll read anyways. :3

[MtnDew]

Almost died from drowning once, and i remember a near death experience in mexico... Oh yeah, ATV's. forget them.

[Scorpion1855]

mentioned a tick I had gotten two weeks earlier... on my snake.

How the forget did you manage that?

[Netwars4]

Allah.

[GRAW2fan]

fell out of my window at school and while falling I was yelling "FUUUUUUUUCK! -Broken leg-"
And I also am on the third floor at my school so not fun.

[Jimmg]

Walking home from school, there was a truck being chased by police cars, apparently I was half-way across the street when it turned the corner. It loving snaked like hell, which really increased the chance it would hit me. The truck hit me in the hip with the front bumper sticking out, I tripped and fell onto the road, that was all. But if I were one second slower, I would have been roadkill.

Pics please.

[Jaxx]

I've only had one near-death experience, I was 12, and we have a swimming pool in our neighborhood, so I put my towel over my handlebars on my bike to get me going, and went with a friend. We managed to get out of our cul-de-sac, before the towel, you guessed it, caught in my wheel, choked the spokes, and put me into a 720 flip, which threw me off my bike, my chin hit my handlebars, my head smashed into the pavement, and I got knocked unconscious. Thankfully, I didn't die, because I was wearing my helmet! :D

tl;dr: Wear your helmet, or you die.